All You Need Is Love

Know your limits!!

2010-08-10T10:38:00.000-07:00

Yes I find this mildly offensive, but also completely hilarious. Hey, if you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at?

I've been feeling pretty cocky lately, what with my ability to build shelves, can apricots, manage a daycare, etc, etc. Yeah, I am pretty awesome. But last night brought up yet again the one thing I fail miserably at time and time again.

I can't make popcorn to save my life.

Flashback 5 1/2 years ago or so. I was engaged to Jay, we were at his parents house, late one night. We decided some microwave popcorn would be nice. So I went up, put a bag in the microwave, hit a button or two, and waited.

A couple minutes later, black smoke is pouring out of the microwave, the smoke alarms are going off, and Jay's parents, who were asleep, are now awake, wondering if their house is burning down.

I don't think there were literally flames coming off the bag, but it was definitely on fire, and to this day there is a fairly large scorch mark in my mother-in-laws microwave.

I haven't done much with popcorn since. . . until last night. Jay convinced me to make some popcorn in the popcorn maker. Ok, so maybe if I can't do the microwaved bit, I can at least manage a popcorn machine right? WRONG. I guess it's been awhile since I used one of those.

I liberally dumped a cup of kernels in, turned on the popper, and waited for results. The results were blackened kernels, and the smell of scorched corn. Apparently one has to turn on the popper, let it heat up first, and then add kernels. Oh.

I am done with making popcorn. I know my limits.

Happy Birthday To Me!

2010-06-14T20:36:00.000-07:00

After painstakingly planning out my dinner and dessert extravaganza for my birthday on Sunday, we decided to do what we do best in the LeVitre household- ditch all former plans and responsibilities and go road-tripping!!

Sunday was much to beautiful to spend inside cooking. We decided the coast of Oregon had seen too much of us lately, and eastern Oregon had places yet to be explored. I do love my rain foresty fifty shades of green forests, but sometimes I really miss the high desert. Fortunately, said desert is only a two hour drive away. Cross the Cascade Mountains, and voila! land of the rain shadow.

We went to Bend, Oregon- a place we have only driven through briefly in blizzards, and set up camp in at 2 am (we were pretty sure it was National forest. . . pretty sure. . . ). It turns out Bend is quite an attractive little town.

After a gorgeous drive up and over the mountains, we had a lovely lunch at Amalia's- a brand new Mexican restaurant with some very unusual twists on typical Mexican fare. I don't think I'll ever be satisfied with another salsa verde again. I must must must figure out their recipe!!!!! (Which of course meant consuming two bowls of the stuff with chips).

We made a brief stopover in a local used cd store, which James was very patient about, and then onto the main attraction The State's Largest Volcano Tube, also known as the Lava River Cave. It's about a mile long, 50 feet under ground, and very very dark.

It was a little difficult to find, we first went to a closed visitor center, then found a private lake, then finally after a highway detour, we found it! And it was closed! But we hadn't driven 130 miles to be stopped by a stupid sign. Seeing as how there wasn't a locked gate, barrier, or armed guards preventing us, we went exploring anyway armed with naught but our jackets, flashlights, and keen sense of adventure!

(Sorry, can't figure out how to flip these pics)

The Descent

James and his very own water bottle

The funnest thing about exploring with a small child is everything is so real. James was absolutely CONVINCED that this was the cave of Droofus the Dragon. Except he was at work, so no one was at home. He initially balked at entering a huge dark cavern, but once we got going he was fine. He actually walked the whole way in and back.

We finished off the day with a splurge at Trader Joe's and some birthday cake donuts. (I made James sing Happy Birthday to me before I would let him have one.)

Fun times had by all!

A Tirade to Myself

2010-06-11T19:32:00.001-07:00

Will somebody please help me understand this insatiable desire I have to pointlessly kill time? Here I sit, playing stupid computer games when I could be doing something infinitely more wholesome. Aside from the obvious- dishes, dinner, etc, I could also be knitting, or reading a book, or stuck with my commitment to blog more (oh, wait, never mind). But instead I choose to dash through stars with my silly little robot unicorn in a vain attempt to beat my old score.

In my defense, I do work. I am the director of a loud, noisy, and sometimes completely insane daycare. I dash around putting out fires, feeding babies, and sometimes even manage to sit and breathe. (And yes, I do love my job) I am more than a little brain damaged by the time I get home every evening. I think this excuses my lack of desire to do dishes.

But why, when I have some perfectly good books, a cute tank top on the knitting needles, and lovely weather outside, why do I consistently find myself staring at a computer screen? And the funny thing is, I am bored, and I know I am bored. And yet, I continue to bore myself.

Maybe I like being bored. Maybe I am over-stimulated through out the day, and being bored feels good. At any rate, I have come to the conclusion this week that this has to stop. I have a few summer goals I would like to accomplish:

1. Blog more. I've been finding more blogs of people and things that interest me, and btw- blogs of PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY BLOG once a week, not once a year.

2. Knit more. My desire to be creative is waking up again- this means more writing, more knitting, and more making of artistic messes that won't get picked up for weeks.

3. The perennial favorite- get more exercise, eat healthier, blah blah blah. No really. This time I mean it.

4. GET OFF THE DAMNED COMPUTER!!

I am turning into such a computer junkie. But there is hope for me! I have made it a point several times to just check my email, then turn off the computer. This way I won't be tempted to
a. sit down to check email,
b. then play computer games,
c. watch more Buffy, while
d. mindlessly surfing the internet- which gets us to
e. realize I've done nothing productive for 3 hours.

I would like to continue to castigate my inner laziness, but I think it's time to turn off my computer and get something done.

2010-06-05T20:26:00.000-07:00

This will be my 100th post! (trumpet fare in background) I've put off posting because I figured if it is going to be the 100th one, I'd better have something important to say. And what could be more important than the choosing of my birthday dinner? Next Sunday I turn 29- and yes I am currently accepting monetary donations, chocolate, and gift cards for pedicures.

My birthday is usually an excuse for me to celebrate summer by cooking something scrumptious. BBQed kabobs or fish is popular, as well as strawberries by the ton. I spend a lot of time thinking about this. For Memorial Day weekend I tried my hand at some strawberry cupcakes with strawberry meringue frosting, thinking perhaps that it would be a test run for possible birthday dessert feasting. It would appear that I am not so good at meringuing anything. And also, I don't like meringue- not that that mattered, because it was all totally gloppy and weird tasting anyway. Oh Martha Stewart, how you have disappointed me.

Ok scratch meringue frosting. But today was the most exciting day of all because I bought an ICE CREAM MAKER!!!!!! EEEEEEE, I am squealing like a little girl just thinking about it. Ice cream, sorbet, frozen yogurt- it's all within my grasp! Tomorrow we are making ice cream with strawberries stolen from our landlord's yard. (Stolen strawberries being the tastiest). But I am already thinking ahead to flavors like mango-ginger, lemon-basil, cucumber- mint, and other hyphenated flavors that probably only belong in lotions and soaps. Don't tell Jay.

So now that I have an ice cream maker I could . . . make cornmeal blackberry cupcakes with vanilla ice cream scoops on top. Or a fresh ice cream cake roll. Cheesecake with ice cream on the side. Mango sorbet on top of ginger cupcakes. Oh the possibilities.

Definitely using an out-of-this world citrus marinade for beef and veggie kabobs. 100% chance of margaritas. Mmmmmm, how I love food.

Craigslist Classics

2010-03-16T09:29:00.001-07:00

After recently scanning Craigslist for possible jobs, apartments, and anything that might catch my eye, I have found some interesting things. Here are my top findings over the last few years that just make me roll my eyes at the gullibility of humanity.

1. This week in jobs- "I need a cosigner so I can buy a car. If you have good credit and make over 100K a year, please contact me"

2. An apartment ad I replied to "I have to go to West Africa to attend to my oil fields, but if you send me a deposit, and your personal information, I will send you the keys to the house"

3. When we were selling our truck a few years ago "I will trade you a computer printer, several beanie babies, a Disney collection. . . (the list went on but I forget what else) for your truck"

4. Yesterday in jobs- "We will pay 50 dollars for every 10 license plates you record and give to us for a database" Is that legal? The man to contact was Dad Turner. Weird.

5. Tried to sell a nondigital camera a few years go- we got a 5 am phone call "I can wire you 500 dollars for your camera." Uh huh. Our fifty dollar camera. All we need to do is give you our bank account number.

I am not knocking Craigslist. I love it- my past jobs, apartments, and cars have all come from there. But besides getting information out, its always good for a laugh.

Wrong Number

2010-02-27T11:52:00.000-08:00

This morning around 8 am my phone rang. No one calls me that early unless its urgent, or a wrong number. I checked and it was a random Utah number I had never heard of. So I ignored it and went back to sleep.

Sure enough, they left me yet another random voicemail for someone I had never heard of. This time, I got a detailed visiting teaching report. Everyone gets wrong numbers at some point or another. I have a long history of receiving the same person's wrong numbers again and again and again.

Her name is Emily. I don't know her, nor have I ever talked to her, but I feel like I am some kind of voyeuristic stranger in her life. Over the last five years I have received detailed reports from her dentist, appointment reminders from her doctor, car accident details from her insurance company, job offers and interviews from employers, and loan details from her banker.

TMI, seriously.

Why don't people listen to voicemail messages? I have my name clearly spoken on there. At first when I received messages for Emily, I felt bad and would call the number back to tell them they dialed wrong. But after a couple of failed communication attempts, I have just given up. Emily really just needs to start writing her phone number more clearly on her paperwork.

Time to Come Clean

2010-02-12T12:31:00.001-08:00

Ok, I think it's finally time to come out of the closet. I've been harboring this secret for way too long. Are you ready? I am in love with Martha Stewart. I know!! I didn't think it would ever come to this.

Sure, I thought her cookie book was divine, but that was harmless right? Then I received her cupcake book for my birthday. Oh wow. She loves to make wonderful recipes, which I love to bake and eat.

Ok, so the woman can cook, but otherwise she goes way overboard on the cleaning, decorating, living your life to fullest on no more than 100,000 a year. Yeah, not exactly my budget.

I think I realized I was becoming hooked when I began buying her magazine a few months ago. Recipes, pretty pictures, flowers, oh my, I sound just like my mother over her Victoria magazine. ( ;)love you, Mom!)

Then I found I could put her website on my home page- I told myself it was so I could drool over her cookie of the day, but then I was spending more and more time over there, looking forward to her newest cleaning tips, holiday ideas, and how to make grocery bags out of old pillow cases.

And now, I am completely obsessed with finding her article on using simple household items to clean with- vingar, baking soda, etc. I can't find it, and I am pining away without it- how else can I possibly clean green without Martha to tell me?????

I think the Valentine's cards that were Martha inspired and took me a whole Saturday to put together was what made me realize I am going over the edge and possibly need intervention. But it's so fun!!! (And fyi- all I spent was money on postage and developing pics)

The Yin The Yang and the Me

2010-02-04T08:34:00.000-08:00

Anyone who has lived with me for more than five minutes can tell you I have always been very impulsive. I get an idea and it just completely consumes me whether its craving a Little Debbie valentine cake with mountain dew on the side at 9 o'clock at night (thank you to Jay for fulfilling that need Tuesday night)or wanting to move 40 miles away, closer to Portland. I don't have a lot of patience when it comes to waiting for things. My mom told me once "when you want something, you want it yesterday" Too true.

My life has been a constant blur of change for the past 10 years, major moves on an average of every six months, in and out of college, getting married, having a child, job layoffs, nervous breakdown, health problems, yada yada.

It's only been in the past few months that I've realized an important fact about myself: I love change, and crave it, but change can also be an incredibly destructive thing for me. (See job layoffs, nervous breakdown, etc above). It's kind of a yin yang thing I suppose, but my yang has typically overpowered my yin and that's just not healthy.

So this year I am focusing on balance. The Chinese theory of Yin and Yang is all about balance and I think they are onto something. I've never been one for moderation, and lately I've been seeing that as a big character flaw and something I want to work on.

On the other hand, I see my spontaneity as a key component of who I am- but I have to keep it in moderation or bad things can happen.

Anyway, back to balance and yin and yang. I am trying really hard for small changes in order to satisfy my restless feelings, and working on a steady routine to give me a sense of security- this sense of security and knowing what I will be doing down the road really helps me through particularly tough episodes of depression.

So my family might walk in the door one evening to see the living room completely rearranged, or my hair a different color, but hopefully we won't be changing jobs or moving anytime soon. I am finding that doing little things like that, or maybe just trying to develop a new talent like sewing can do a lot to make me feel like a new person.

I am trying really hard to stick to one project at a time, and have a fairly steady routine. If I have a routine most days, the days when I say "screw the schedule" are that much more fun. Starting a new knitting project or renovating idea is really exciting, but finishing one, and being proud of my work is also quite thrilling.

FYI- I don't think I've kept a job for more than a year. I am just starting year 2 of my current transcribing job, gotten a substantial pay raise (something you don't see when you only work in places for a year tops) and still really like my work.

We've lived in this townhome for 2 years now, and every year we discuss moving somewhere cheaper, closer to work, etc, but in the end, here we are still.

Jay and I have been married for 5 years this May. Really, I think that is the longest I've stuck with anything. It's kind of surprising when I think about that way. It's not that I didn't expect to be married to him for this long- when I married Jay, I had every intention of growing old together. And yes, about once every year or so I seriously reconsider my marriage vows for a day or so. But except for those angry days, I constantly think about how lucky I am to have Jay and how much he puts up with my craziness, and how grateful I am to have someone willing to partake in adventure with me, but also able to keep me steady.

"Balance Grasshopper....

I think most of us know that balance is an essential part of life. If you are going to stand on a tiny beam stretching across a mud pile with one foot tucked beneath your bum, it would be a good idea to hold your arms out."

I am more likely to just jump in the mud to see what it feels like.

Fun Times in the Kitchen, or how to make chicken go splat on your walls

2010-01-28T12:34:00.000-08:00

I like to beat chicken. Correct that. I like to beat the HELL out of chicken. It's been my favorite past time for the last two weeks since I discovered how fun it is. No, not live chickens- the Humane Society where Jay works would have my head on a platter for that one. I am discovering just how cool chicken paillards are, thanks to Martha Stewart.

Paillards (which in my pathetic attempt at French I call "pay-lards") are boneless, skinless chicken breasts pounded flat. I've always seen them, and liked to eat them, but I didn't know how easy it was to actually make them.

My first attempt was a couple weeks ago, after purchasing a Martha Stewart Living magazine. They had a whole section on paillards and simple recipes for them. I discovered I didn't have a mallet, but that's ok, because a hammer is quite fun too, albeit messier, because I tend to splat chicken pieces onto the walls.

I like paillards because even though its the same amount of chicken I started with, when I pound it flat it looks like more. So I think I am eating more, but not really. Any preschooler can explain that concept for you.

I like paillards because I can sprinkle lemon pepper, or italian bread crumbs on them, and cook them in olive oil in five minutes. Voila! Dinner!

But, really, I like paillards because I get to SMASH THEM WITH A HAMMER!!! HA HA HA!! (For all you disneyphiles out there, I get Yzma's voice in my head saying that line, every time I pull out my mallet now.)

This weekend I finally invested in a meat smashing mallet because a hammer, or a heavy metal spoon, or a rolling pin, although good in a pinch just don't do as good a job.

Since then, I've been pounding chicken breasts flat a couple times a week, sprinkling some spices on them, and serving them over spinach or rice, or something equally yummy. My kitchen wall adjoins my neighbors wall, so I am not sure what they think about all the pounding, but no complaints so far.

Meat smashing is fun. It tends to work out my frustrations in a very primitive way but with a very yummy result. I recommend it to anyone. If you need any meat smashing tips, watch Yzma's evil plotting on "The Emperor's New Groove." It's very informative.

A Mystery Most Puzzling

2010-01-11T10:45:00.000-08:00

Object in question: one small round jar of hair wax, used for giving that tousled, yet carefully arranged bed head look.

Victim: Inger-Lis LeVitre. Very torn up, irritated, and having to make due with her husband's hair product, which is NOT THE SAME, and dealing with an off hair day on a Monday, of course.

Person of Interest: James LeVitre. Very interested in said hair wax, as well as mommy's make up, blow dryer, and anything he could possibly make a mess with in the bathroom. No hair wax trails have been found, so he is not listed as a suspect yet.

Witnesses: Spouse of said victim claims to have seen hair product only yesterday.

James is wanted for questioning at this point. He was last seen in the care of his babysitter. He will be turning himself in at 5:30 today, when mommy picks him up.

Victim has been tearing bathroom apart looking for missing object. This includes thinking like a certain 3 year old who is not a suspect yet but likes to hide things in weird and definitely gross places.

Places have looked:

In toilet
under toilet plunger
in toilet bowl brush bucket
in garbage
in toy cups
in child's bedroom

Some locations have yielded other lost items, such as tooth brush, soap, and little rubber froggies, but not item in question.

If you have seen this item (Fructis brand, neon green, with bright yellow lid) you are asked to contact LeVitre household immediately. Reward of yummy cookies are being offered.

Thank you.

Day 1

2010-01-10T19:14:00.000-08:00

Today being the first day of the rest of my life, and the first day of the 10 in 2 challenge, I thought I would update anyone interested in how the day went.

Water- doing well on this one. 8 oz really isn't as much as I remember it being. Also, I count hot herbal tea as water- no sugar or additives, just an herb pack and hot water. It's a nice warming zero calorie beverage for my cold house.

Tonight I am making a vegetable soup recipe I found in Martha Stewart Living magazine. This is not your normal veggie soup, it's got leeks, butternut squash, and lemon juice in it. And WOW, my tasting sips so far have been heavenly. This is a lot of servings of veggies. I am also trying popovers for the first time. These are like the high rises of the muffin world. Tall, ungainly, and light, they mostly consist of flour, eggs, and milk. Mine aren't popping though. Mostly they just look like pale, content little muffins. Darn.

I don't think I am going to get any not eating after 8 pm points today. I fell asleep around 4:00 pm and didn't wake up until 6:00. So dinner is late. It's 7:21 here, and I am on the cusp of serving it.

But then, having taken a 2 hour blissful nap, I am not sure when I am going to bed anyway. . .

Hey, I'm Back!

2009-11-21T13:34:00.001-08:00

Having deleted farmville, I need something else to do on my computer besides posting snarky random comments on facebook. You can only go so far with that. Soooo.. . . I decided it was probably time to start blogging again.

This being winter time, I typically have two things on my mind- 1. staying warm in my refrigerator of a house, and 2. cooking. Winter and fall are when I get really into experimenting with new recipes and cooking some serious comfort food. I also get really into casseroles, something I do NOT eat the rest of the year. It doesn't hurt that every time I heat up the oven, my house temperature goes up a notch.

This may get turned into a food blog over the next few months. But, I think people should blog about what they love, and well, I love food. I also love a cooking challenge, and usually the biggest challenge around here is how to make food James and I will consistently eat that consists mostly of rice, beans, onions, tomatoes, potatoes and pasta- these being very cheap with a long shelf life. (I purposely exclude Jay from this, because he will eat just about anything. Lucky him).It also has to be quick because I get home around 5:30 and expect dinner half an hour later.

I have vegetable fixation. I find a vegetable I don't know much about, and then want to figure out how to cook it up yummy. This morning I decided I want to learn more about lima beans. I've completely given up on eggplant. I think the only good eggplant is breaded, deepfried and smothered in cheese, served with a side of Olive Garden breadsticks.

Cabbage has been put aside for now. My red cabbage relish was not the greatest, nor was my thai coleslaw. Maybe I will try kimchee next . . .

Anyone out there like lima beans? Any ideas on what to do with a lima bean? I remember I kinda liked them in the frozen mixed vegetables we used to eat as kids. But beyond that, they are a mystery.

This is Unbelievable!

2009-09-29T19:23:00.001-07:00

I just booked my flight for Las Vegas- I am happy to have finally done that and very excited to go. However, I could not believe the HASSLE involved in booking my flight. Don't ever go Allegiance Air if you don't have to. They sneak fees in on you right and left. I have never had so many sneaky fees creep in on my bill. First they tried to charge me for my seat- a priority seating fee, AND a fee to be able to change my seat. A grand total of 20 dollars each way.

Then they automatically threw in a 15 dollar shuttle fee, which took forever to figure out how to remove. I debated whether or not to use the baggage check, which was an additional 30 dollars, but then figured while I could probably manage to carry on enough clothes for 4 days, I could NOT carry on contact solution, toothpaste, or any of my meds. So I guess I have to pay 30 dollars now. (I do realize that is the norm now)

What really put me over the edge was at the very end, they snuck in one last 50 dollar charge- the option to change my ticket if I needed to. They didn't ask, they just put it in and I had to read the very fine print in order to get it off.

I guess I wouldn't be so disgusted if I had used a website like CheapTickets.com- but this was the only website the Eugene Airport had to sell their tickets. Not only do they have a corner on the Eugene to Vegas market, but they sneak fees in left and right. Grrrrrrr.

Why I Should Never Own a House

2009-09-24T15:18:00.000-07:00

My parents have always told me I am hard on things- clothes, toys, furniture, parents, you name it, I guarantee I can wear it out long before its supposed to. I can't really help it. No really, I can't. It takes all my concentration to not jerk my foot around on the gas pedal while driving the car- so much concentration that I can't pay attention to anything else around me. This drives most of my passengers absolutely crazy. The only one who doesn't notice this seems to be James. He grew up with my driving. Heck, he will probably do the same thing when he takes driving lessons- I bet he thinks its normal.

I will attempt to suck up anything- and I mean anything with a vacuum- loose change, hair elastics, cat food, dirty clothes, plastic toys. Its amusing to me, and well, any way you can make house cleaning amusing, specifically vacuuming, seems worth it to me. This is probably why the only vacuum that works for me is a 1970s Kirby model. I don't think you could kill it if you tried.

I tried to destroy our disposal with black plastic SD card a couple weeks ago. Ok, that was totally an accident, no I didn't see it fall in there. But I guess that is my point- I am hard on things simply by being around them long enough.

Fortunately for me, the disposal is covered by our rental agency. Our washing machine is not. We bought it less than 2 years ago, and already I managed to basically alter the entire integrity of the machine. I know its me, Jay knows its me, but we don't like to point fingers, its not nice. Last week it quite spinning. Just like that. No more spin, just dripping wet towels and blankets. I should have seen this coming with the pounding sound its been making every time I do laundry, but I just ignored it and put more queen sized blankets in.

I have yet to plumb the depths of Jay's knowledge of appliances, and maybe he makes stuff up as he goes along, but when things break he never ceases to amaze me in his ability to fix them. He hauled the washer out to the garage and soon had it in chunks all over the floor. This made me very nervous. I have never seen a person take a washing machine apart with the intention of putting it back together again. I decided I might be better off not watching him butcher my favorite machine, so I went back inside. He came in periodically to give me an update.

At one point he walked in with large two plastic rings and announced he found the problem. I could have told him the problem- the problem was the washing machine didn't work and no amount of swearing or pounding on it on my part had fixed it. Actually the problem was the machine had gotten off kilter and the plastic rings had melted and fused together. Or something like that. Wow, I don't think I have ever melted an appliance before.

Not only did he find the problem, he fixed it, AND put the washer back together again, all in one night. I was suitably impressed- possibly more by the fact that he put the washer back together than anything else.

So now I have my beloved washer back, but I have to consider it something of an invalid, permanently compromised, and probably incapable of ever washing a large blanket, 2 pillows, and several large towels all at once ever again.

I think James may have inherited this trait from me. That trait, mixed with natural toddler curiosity, is destroying my house. I caught him last week moments before he tried heating a can of chicken soup in the microwave. He was the one who put that black SD card in the sink in the first place. He also has a reputation for putting popsicle sticks in the vacuum cleaner, then when I turn it on, they all get jammed in the rotor. I had to replace the rotor once for that reason.

A month or so ago he put his plastic "Tappy the Turtle" in the oven, I think he was making turtle pizza. I didn't know it was in there, so I preheated the oven for dinner and roasted little Tappy- who is about a foot in diameter. His green feet oozed over my oven rack, and I just managed to scoop the rest of him onto a pizza pan and outside before he destroyed my entire oven. Thanks a lot James.

Some of you may have heard about the house painting incident as well. Or the "sneaking out of bed in the middle of the night and trying to make oatmeal" incident. I am just interested to see who accidentally burns down the house first- me or James.

Am I the Only Guilty Party Here?

2009-08-27T14:52:00.001-07:00

I have a bit of a reputation for unfinished projects. Unfinished half knitted sweaters, tubs full of yarn, fabric and good intentions, a pile of clothes I started to take apart but didn't quite put back together, etc etc etc. Today my projects include repainting my interior, compose a menu and shopping list, finish laundry, finish sewing James' curtains, and recover my filing cabinet.

So here is what my house looks like: blank walls that I have taken down the pictures, but not yet scrubbed. Then I decided while James naps that I should recover my filing cabinet with some wall paper I have. At that moment, I realized that I had also planned on putting laundry away and finishing my half composed grocery list while James slept. Oh, and while I was cleaning up the wall area I found the box of baby clothes I need to send to Liz- so I finished packing that. Now I just need to tape it up and mail it tomorrow.

Filing cabinet sounds more fun than scrubbing. Oh yeah, and I have to refinish James little wooden desk (mental note- kick it out into the garage). And what am I doing right now? I am blogging about all the stuff I have to do but can't quite straighten out in my head how to start. I think this all has to do with the fact that Monday I will resume my job, via skype at home, from morning until early afternoon. This is it folks- the end of my summer. Meanwhile I never did quite organize the house like I wanted to. So now in the final few days I am running around like a chicken with its head cut off trying to figure out what is the most urgent. And by urgent I mean what sounds like the most fun.

So I guess I am curious- I know I am not the only one out there who has tons of unfinished projects. I am getting better though- I finished repainting James dresser and mostly made his new curtains. Its not my fault I ran out of thread two feet short of finishing. (It is my fault I have had the replacement thread for three days now and have done nothing with it though).

Unfinished projects bother me. They niggle at the edges of my peripheral vision every time I walk past them, crying "finish me!!" Waste really irritates me and nothing says waste like a perfectly good something that just needs an hour of attention to be usable or attractive again.

Now to be perfectly honest, I still have next week to do some of these things. I figure I spend until 1:00 or so working and then two to three hours of household projects before I pick up James from daycare. If I focus I can accomplish a lot, but focus is typically what I lack, and I think I need to go get fabric for my kitchen window curtains . . . and part of me just wants to throw my hands in the air, sit down, and watch movies all day. I am very firmly squishing that part of me to the side today.

Ok Inger-Lis, stop. Take a deep breath. Finish. The. Walls. Alright, if nothing else, these walls are gonna get painted today.

Day 3

2009-08-17T13:49:00.001-07:00

I am in the midst of day 3 on the South Beach Diet. I can do this! And ok, I know this means nothing at the moment, but I have already lost 4 pounds! Yeah, I know that is not technically possible, and it is probably water weight, but I DON'T CARE!!! I lost weight!

Go ahead and laugh all you want, but being overweight does strange things to a person. I am absolutely beyond desperate to lose weight. I am sick of this belly hanging down in front of me, and I know it is not healthy. I've tried exercise but can never seem to stick with anything, I just don't have the energy. Although I like to think that chasing after James all day means something. And yes, literally, I chase him. He moves fast now.

So anyway, day 3 of subsisting on veggies, lean meat, low-fat cheeses, and lots of water. Fortunately this phase is only 14 days long. After that I can eat whole grains again, and fruit. I think this is the longest I have gone in a long long time without a cookie. (Hmm, how did I gain all this weight in the first place?)

I have to admit the hardest part was when Jay poured himself a bowl of Reeses Peanut Butter Cup cereal, right in front of me. I don't think he had any idea what he was doing to me, but my mouth started watering, and I had to just walk out of the kitchen, I wanted some so bad.

It really helps to have a schedule laid out for me. My downfalls are moments like that, when something just looks to-die-for good, like sugary cereal, and I am hungry. Willpower is lowest at those moments and making a healthy choice all on my own is nearly impossible. So it is nice to just look in the book for an acceptable snack, and go eat a cheese stick, or sugar-free jello. Or both.

If I can do this hardest stage now, while I am not working and actually have time to prepare all the food necessary, I should be able to stick with the less stringent guidelines later on when I am back at work. And hopefully by the time I am back at work I can fit into most of my workpants again.

I Love You George!!!

2009-08-08T19:20:00.000-07:00

This is a shameless plug for my George Foreman grill. I have wanted one for quite awhile, and recently picked up a used on at my local thrift store for about 5 bucks. I am not sure what makes me happier, the fact that I finally have a GF grill, or that I only paid 5 dollars for one.

It makes everything!! And it makes everything taste great!! Thus far we have made pork chops, chicken strips, grilled cheese sandwiches, grilled veggie sandwiches, quesadillas, and a cornucopia of grilled veggies. I wonder if I can make cookies on it. . .

Seriously, I may never use my oven again- at least not in the summer. I can heat up the grill, make a delicious dinner, and have hardly any cleanup, all without heating up the kitchen and using huge amounts of electricity.

I am not a big fan of gadgets, I mostly think they clutter up a kitchen, and never get used. But a GF grill is actually a wonderful thing that I do use. So if you don't have one, I highly recommend it.

George Foreman should pay me for this kind of advertising.

The Things That Define Us

2009-07-22T15:21:00.000-07:00

Do you ever find it interesting how people perceive themselves, and how they portray themselves to the world? If you are a people watcher like myself, you probably do. Take Facebook for example (and realize that I do this too) and all the silly little quizzes on there. Its interesting how we can fill up our time playing mindless little quizzes- What fairy tale character are you, What Disney Princess are you, What decade most fits you, What kind of boobs do you have? ok, maybe I am the only one who took that last one . . .

But I always find it funny how I play these quizzes and when the results are right on with how I would like to perceive myself I feel just a little triumphant. Yes, that is so totally who I am!! or completely off - No way, that is not me at all!! And yet, it is a little electronic quiz. 5-10 questions and there you have my personality in a nutshell. Not really though. So now I can tell the world, or at least my facebook community, that I am the Big Bad Wolf, Mulan (who isn't a princess, btw you quiz creators) and a straight out of the eighties party girl, among other things.

Yes its silly, I know, and yet I feel just slightly better about myself having figured that out.

Bumper stickers are another one- think about this- everyone you meet automatically knows that you have an honor student, or four kids and a cat, voted on the McCain/Palin ticket- or you are a Christian- or Evolutionist depending on whether the fish back there has legs or not. ok, maybe I just picked the bumper stickers I hate the most first off- let's be fair- you can also tell the world you are a Vegetarian, Share the Road, Buy Local, etc.

How many of you see bumper stickers and in the back of your mind decide whether or not you like that person? How many of you laugh at a bumper sticker and then think "wow, I like this person" or "OMG, who let them out of the asylum?" And yet, I might really like the person who voted for McCain- I could never discuss politics with them nicely, but I might like them. And I might find the Share the Road guy to be a total pretentious ass, even though he's got a nice bumper sticker.

I promise this is not a tirade on bumper stickers.

I just find our culture so interesting sometimes- we are desperate to define ourselves to the world in short 10 words or less blurbs. Realize you have 30 seconds of a stoplight for someone to know you- what will you put on your car?

So many things to be fans of on Facebook. What will YOU choose?

Admittedly, I am curious to see myself from another's point of view. Am I really as funny as I think I am? Probably not. Am I really as fat as I think I am? Again, probably not. Am I the only one who thinks about these things? I don't know, you tell me.

2009-07-14T18:40:00.001-07:00

I am not feeling very blogalicious lately. My job this summer is making my brain tired. But I am not giving up! And as soon as I get out of my summer writer's block funk I will be back.

On Being Sick and Feeling Sorry for Myself

2009-06-19T17:10:00.000-07:00

With allergies sometimes its hard to tell when you are genuinely sick. I have had a stuffy nose and sneezing fits for so long, when it got worse, I just kept going and figured that living in beautiful Willamette Valley had its downers too. Unfortunately the truth hit me eventually and I had to succumb to the fact that I have a cold. But this isn't a blog about me feeling sorry for myself and how wretchedly sick I have been. Or, as I have learned from watching countless episodes of 30 Rock today, "some people have it worse- like having a bee sting you, or a splinter, or being chained to a wall in a sex dungeon."

(Definitely my favorite quote of the day.)

This is about the upside to being sick. Being sick as a kid undoubtedly was better than being sick as an adult and a parent. When you are a kid, you get to stay home from school, without feeling guilty. Your mom brings you juice in sippy cups and you can watch movies all day.

Usually being sick as an adult means you have to go to work anyway, OR move the heavens and earth to find a substitute at your job, and then spend all day feeling guilty for not being able to work. I usually save my heaven and earth moving abilities for when James is too sick to go to daycare and suck it up when I am sick. But this week fortunately I am on a small break between spring and summer semester. (Yeah, I know I said earlier I was having summer vacation all summer, but jobs came through, and I need the money.) AND, even more fortunately, I paid my sitter through the month of June. This means I have daycare, even if I am not working.

I am not one of those to just get rid of my kid because I can, but after spending a night on the couch tossing and turning and sleeping with my mouth wide open-- you know how you sleep when you have a head cold-- I needed a serious 8 hour nap, and my body was determined to get it, whether or not I had a two year old in the house. So Jan took him, and I bet she lysoled her entire house after the zombie mommy a.k.a. me left. I looked pretty bad.

Anyway, this was one of those serendipitous moments where I had a totally valid reason to
A. watch tv all day,
B. lie around the house,
C. take that 8 hour nap,
D. drug myself into oblivion,
and lastly
E. be a total bitch and nobody can say anything cause I am SICK!!

I can't say I never do any of the above when I am well, but I feel guilty when I do and I don't believe I ever get to do all of that in one day. I am totally in love with 30 Rock now, I love you, Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin. Funny Funny Funny. And I have revived my inner child with several faery tale theatre episodes. Thank you Shelley Duvall.

Jay watched me last night either in awe or just plain confusion "Inger-Lis, are you really watching netflix, doing an online jigsaw puzzle, AND eating ice cream at the same time?" You bet I was. I can multi-task laziness just as well as anything else.

Anyway, I think sometimes being sick is nature's way of telling you to give up for awhile and just be a slob, guilt-free. It works for me. I have to go now, I still have 9 more episodes of 30 Rock Season 1 to get through.

Our Family Is Growing!

2009-06-12T13:45:00.000-07:00

We are getting an addition to our little family, we just found out a couple days ago! He's white and grey, and very affectionate. (Ha ha, did you think I meant I was pregnant? Surely you know that just ain't gonna happen anytime soon ;))

We are becoming a three cat family. I never thought I would have a three cat family, but he just desperately needed us. Here is the story. About a year ago we fostered some kittens. Five to be exact. It is not an experience I ever plan to repeat, but one of our fosters, Waylon stayed with us for quite a long time. We grew to love him and were thinking about adopting him. But I had serious reservations about having three cats, not wanting to become another one of the crazy cat people in our neighborhood. We also thought maybe he could find a loving home with people who could give him the constant attention he craved. So after he got well (kitty foster care is for sick cats) we gave him back to the shelter where he soon got adopted.

Fast forward to almost a year later. A couple days ago Waylon was surrendered to the shelter in seriously bad shape. The family claimed they were moving, but Waylon was so desperately ill that we are all pretty sure they just said that so they wouldn't have to foot a vet's bill.

(ok, so maybe I shouldn't judge, maybe they were really moving, maybe they couldn't afford a vet's bill. Or maybe they were just jerks.)

Anyway, he needed serious care and antibiotics. But as soon as we heard he was returned we pretty much made up our minds to adopt him. Jay and I felt really bad about the whole thing, because we really did think it was for the best that he go back to the shelter and get adopted.

He is at our house now, reacquainting himself with our other cats. He and Gypsy had quite a love affair going last year, but I think she is pissed he left her, because all she does now is hiss at him. Hopefully they will kiss and make up soon.

His little body has been seriously compromised and he will need extra care and tlc for the rest of his life probably. Also a special diet. Which makes him not very adoptable, all the more reason for us to take him in.

So here we are with three cats. One more, and cats will out number people here. I don't think I am going to let that happen.

On the Dangers of Basil

2009-06-04T19:46:00.000-07:00

I finally got my garden going in full gear. Perhaps that is why I have not blogged. All I have to do is think about my plants or step outside my front door and instantly I am on my hands and knees pulling out weeds, babying my plants and generally being completely oblivious to my other duties.

Point in fact- the other day my neighbor came over to return something. She happened to comment on my garden and two seconds later I was out the door proudly showing off my babies. Ten minutes later I realized that perhaps I should go check on James who was inside supposedly playing in the living room. But of course he wasn't there. The house was quiet, too quiet.
I found him upstairs in my bathroom. He had my tub of body butter (for those of you-- mostly male I am sure-- who don't know what that is, just think really really thick lotion) and had spread it liberally in his hair, on his cheeks, counter, hands, etc. He had a pretty good war paint theme going on. Incidentally, he was singing "Twinkle Little Star" whilst decorating himself. HA!! I wasn't mad, it wasn't his fault his mommy doesn't keep a good eye on him and he was having such a good time. Mostly I just laughed.

Today I ate my first handful of mesclun lettuce I was able to harvest. My beets are not doing well though, sad. But I have four different types of basil!! Not sure what my zucchini has planned yet, but the tomatoes seem happy as do the green beans. I used an old baker's rack for a trellis for them-- minus the shelves.

The lawn sadly enough is not getting nearly the attention my garden is. In fact I think it is in imminent danger of being tilled under to make way for more veggies. My lawn mower is crap, and all the good sun is being taken up by useless grass. Pshaw. I need garlic, edamame, red carrots, blah, blah, blah, not grass. Not that I really have grass, mostly I just have a large, very aggressive clover patch.

Pictures might be forthcoming if we can find the camera.

My Summer Vacation, By Inger-Lis

2009-05-21T20:52:00.000-07:00

This is my summer vacation plan.

I am going to hang out with James. Everyday.

We are going to go to the pool and play.

We are going to read books at the library during story time.

I found upholstery fabric for a dollar a yard-- for four bucks I get to recover my dining room chairs, hooray!! Now if I could only figure out how to get the backs off. . .

I am going to exercise and lose 20 lbs. Yes that is my goal, and now that I have said it to the whole world, I really have to go through with it.

James is going on his first camping trip. To the beach, baby!!

I will be working twelve hours every Saturday at our local farmer's market.

I am going to live in shorts and tanktops. And maybe a sarong. I want to make myself a sarong.

James and I will spend every waking minute together during the week. Every. Waking. Minute. That hasn't happened since I went back to work when he was about three months old. Actually, I am really excited and looking forward to it. He has become a very interesting little person as of late and is quite fun to play with. He can also entertain himself for hours. That is nice.

And I know that someday soon I will not longer be receiving spontaneous hugs and kisses from him. He will prefer to play with his friends instead of tickling games with me. Someday he may even stop playing in the litterbox ( I hope, I hope, I hope).

And so, I am glad I get to spend a few months, just him and me, playing outside and running around wild. I like school jobs, you get the summers off. It feels just like you are a kid again- I can't remember the last time I had a summer off with no full-time job and no worries about looking for a job.

Two more weeks. I can't wait!!

The Eternal Gaze

2009-05-20T22:35:00.000-07:00

I am a fan of the strange and sometimes grotesque. In fact, it is the weird and sometimes morbidly offbeat that enchants me more than society's typical idea of beauty. It is different and refreshing to me. Here is a really interesting film short by Sam Chen on Alberto Giacometti- a man famous for his stretched-thin hollow-eyed figures. It is in two parts, if you make it through the first part, I think part two is the best of all. Love the ending, love the existential themes throughout, love the art work. Be patient, it takes a bit to download.

I still got it!!

2009-05-17T10:50:00.000-07:00

Every once in awhile I think I like to feel that I am young and invincible. After all, I am only what.. 26? ok maybe 27. Add ten years onto that with a two year old.

Jay and I went on a date Friday night. I was looking forward to it all week, because we have both been so busy we have hardly seen each other in a month. Anyway-- date night. We have a hard time coming up with date ideas. There just isn't much to do in Salem besides dinner and a movie and that is boooooring! We tend to play our activities by ear. We cruised down to a local festival in town which was o.k. The music was great but so loud that it threatened to bring back my migraine so we left shortly thereafter. And had no idea what to do next. It was only 10:00 and we still wanted to play.

I jokingly suggested a moonlit walk on the beach, the beach being a good hours drive away. I say jokingly but really it was a gorgeous night and I haven't been to the beach since summer. Jay thought it sounded fun and a good way to ensure I stayed up all night so off we went.

Sometimes nothing is more fun than just taking a long drive with your honey, without the added benefit of a demanding toddler in the backseat. The drive up was quite lovely. Then we raided the Lincoln City Safeway for cash and chocolate and hit the beach.

It was cold but absolutely beautiful. The color of the water blended into the night sky, except for the white crests of the waves that broke onto the shore. There were hardly any city lights and few people on the beach at midnight. We beach combed in the dark with only a small flashlight to find shells. Obviously, we didn't have much success.

Then, in a complete atmospheric reversal we ran into the local casino to try our luck with the slot machines. We lost. But that is ok, because we only gambled ten bucks. It was about 1:00 when we started back. We stopped along the way to look at the stars.

I didn't go to bed until about 2:30 am. Which would be fine, except I work at 5 am on saturdays. So I had to wake up at 4 am. I was quite impressed that I managed 13 hours of hard physical labor on less than two hours of sleep. Energy drinks are quite helpful in situations like these.

I am now just waking up from a good sixteen hour marathon sleep. It was a really fun weekend, and occasionally, maybe once a year, it is fun to know I can still pull off an all nighter. It makes me feel young and alive. Or maybe young and foolish. Take your pick.

Alternate State of Mind

2009-05-05T21:39:00.000-07:00

I don't have much to say, but I will say something anyway, because somebody around here has to blog, right? Am I right? First off, after my last post, I am pretty sure I will never receive presents from anybody again. Well I love you guys anyway.

I seem to be a work-aholic. I spent the last month being so panicked about losing hours of work that I found an extra Saturday job at the farmer's market. Then my weekday hours suddenly picked up again, and now I am working almost all day six days a week. Yet somehow in all this work, I am finding time to read. A lot. I have read something like three books this week, which when I was a teenager was nothing, but now that I have 'sponsibilities, is quite impressive to me.
This large amount of fiction I am consuming means that I seem to be walking around in a literary daze. Not sure if it is just stress, or the fact that my nose has been in a book almost constantly lately, but I am not mentally all there. I find myself missing turnoffs as I drive, and contemplating the mysteries of the cosmos whilst at work. My cynical side is also taking over. Sometimes reading depressing novels can do that to me.

I don't know how many times Jay has asked me if I am mad at him. No, Jay, I am not mad at you, just spacey and stressed out. I think we both need a vacation.

Five more weeks of school to go!

Is it the thought that counts??

2009-04-29T19:51:00.001-07:00

Referring back to an earlier post about reusing, recycling, and not buying things much anymore, I am thinking about presents lately. This is because
A. Mother's Day is coming up
B. Then Father's Day is coming up
C. But before that my anniversary is coming up
D. I already forgot or put off doing anything for my parents birthdays earlier this year.

I think the idea of just going out and buying something for somebody is definitely off-putting for me. Can I use that word? Is that even a word? I don't like stuff and I don't like feeling that by giving stuff to other people, I am obligating them to keep more stuff. Besides my parents are in the midst of moving so I really don't think they need much right now anyway.

On the other hand, I feel like a heel if I don't do anything. I mean, I love my parents. I want them to feel special on holidays and birthdays, and unfortunately I don't live close enough to make them a delicious meal or garden for them.

So I get in this dilemma every gift-giving time of not wanting to give an impersonal card or gift, and intending to make something cute and small or edible. Then of course I put it off and don't do it, and inevitably I don't do anything except call and apologize for being a forgetful jerk. This is also what happened during Christmas.

And let's not forget the fact that men are impossibly hard to shop for or give gifts to.

Yes, I know I make things way more complicated than they have to be.

Get Smart, Feed the World

2009-04-21T17:59:00.001-07:00

Apparently I am always the last to know about cool websites- but for those of you who don't know about this one - FreeRice- you can play trivia with a number of topics from art to vocabulary and for each question you get right, you have donated 10 grains of rice to the UN Food Program.

Hey its fun. Try it.

The Mysteries of Language

2009-04-17T14:17:00.000-07:00

I recently moved up in the world of transcribing, to college courses. Currently, I am sitting in on the most fascinating linguistics course and learning all sorts of things about verbs that I have tried to repress since eighth grade. But perhaps most importantly, I have learned from a college professor that using the word ‘can’ in a question of permission is completely permissible and should not be subject to the snarky reply of “I don’t know, can you?” So there.

Now I know that I CAN ask if I CAN go to the bathroom, and I CAN use the word CAN as a perfectly acceptable substitute for the word may, because a Doctor of Linguistics says I CAN. If anybody gives you grief over the usage you can give them the technical explanation. “The deontic usage of the word ‘can’ denotes a loose social obligation , in that I am asking, not if I am capable of going to the bathroom, but if I am allowed.” Then you can smugly leave to go to the lavatory, while they are looking up the meaning of the word ‘deontic.’

I find language simply fascinating. Was that the reason that I studied so many languages in high school, or was studying Latin, German, ASL, and Spanish what made me love languages? I don’t know which is cause and which is effect, but the end result is I love to watch and discuss how languages evolve. Chalk up another mark to my rampant nerdiness.

In other language fronts, isn’t it so fascinating when kids go beyond the parroting phase of language into creating their own string of sentences? James is finally getting to that point. Sure he has been chattering and talking for quite some time but mostly in one or two word phrases and the occasional sentences that he hears the adults repeat to him over and over.

I have noticed that in the past month or so, he has gone beyond that to forming his own conclusions about words and what they mean. He makes the most interesting leaps of logic and expresses those ideas to me in very cute and fascinating ways.

For example- he loves pepperoni, but when we bought baloney, he associated the similar sound of the words with pepperoni. Then we moved onto to lunch meat which looked similar to baloney. The end result is he now calls all lunch meat “pepper-blowni.” You have to spit when you say the Ps and Bs too, to get the right effect. And ok, it was so cute, we all call it pepperblowni now.

He also asks me to “open” his strawberries. This means taking the leafy stem part off. I can only figure that “opening” food to him means making it edible and accessible to him.

This morning, as I was insisting on putting his shoes and socks before we went to the sitters, and he was fighting tooth and nail against it, he announced “I want my feet back on!” I am not sure if he properly appreciated why I was laughing at him.

Are You Ready for More Art??

2009-04-13T17:22:00.000-07:00

I swear this isn't an ugly one. In fact I quite like it- it makes me smile. There is a lot of symbolism and imagery in it that I won't go into, suffice it to say it is about consumerism in the 1950s. The guy on the billboard outside is Al Jolson, whom I now love simply because Jay does the most hilarious interpretation of him.

The naked guy with the BLOW POP is Charles Atlas, a famous body builder, and I am not sure who the nude with the lamp shade on the couch is. I just love their poses and the detail. I would totally hang this in my bathroom, if only for Charles Atlas.

Just What Is It That Makes Today's Homes So Different, So Appealing?
By Richard Hamilton

Profound Profundity

2009-04-09T14:40:00.001-07:00

Here is a thought to ponder- Did you ever stop to think about the way the earth recycles carbon? For example: A carbon atom in your fingernail could be the very same carbon atom that once lived inside the tooth of a tyrannosaurus rex. Whoa.

2009-04-06T17:04:00.000-07:00

My latest hobby or goal in life is to be a reuser. Maybe I will come up with a better term than that eventually, but right now I am too busy remaking and reusing things. I love it when the things I am into come into fashion as well. Second hand and thrift is chic right now and my creativity is working overtime making new and fun things from items I have had lying around the house.

Last week I took a turtleneck that was too large ( turtlenecks are way too choky for me as well), cut off the sleeves and neck, added lace to the sleeves and hem and now I have a very cute, fashionable t-shirt to wear to work. Next on my list is to make James some shorts now that the weather has changed for the warmer.

In the course of my wanting new clothes for free, I discovered something about myself- I can't follow a sewing pattern to save my life, but I am pretty good at altering and changing clothes free-hand into something else.

I have decided I am through buying things new. Except for food of course. My new motto is "Use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without." (An old depression saying) I am not sure where thrift store shopping comes into that, but I got four adorable summery wear-to-work shirts today for 8 dollars total.

Money is an issue with us, but my desire to buy used and reuse as much as possible goes deeper than that. I just think that we as a society, myself included, are just too much into consumerism. It is wasteful and harmful to our environment. Ok, enough said about that- I won't get too preachy. Of course I realize that if everyone consumed much much less there would be far less for me to buy second hand....

Anyway, I am having a blast on my sewing machine (I never thought I would say that).

Of course it doesn't hurt that Jay tells me I am incredibly sexy when I am cheap and thrifty. What can I say? Flattery is free and I like it.

Just Another Manic Monday

2009-03-30T16:58:00.000-07:00

Ok, really, I don't think I should be allowed out in public on Mondays. Or at least not without my own personal escort. I seem to be a walking disaster most days, but more so on Monday. And the Monday after spring break... well.. wow. I got an extra last minute job today which I was thrilled about. The only problem was it was forty minutes away, started in an hour, and I accidentally left the seat warmer on in the car- hence- dead battery.

My life today felt like that book (children's books freqently come to my head at times like this) Fortunately. Fortunately, I got an extra job. Unfortunately, I killed my battery. Fortunately there just happened to be a qwest truck at the remote park I was visiting and fortunately I have jumper cables.

Unfortunately, I cannot tell my left from from my right and took the wrong exit. Unfortunately that required a major turn around in the middle of the Willamette River - yes, you heard it right. Just imagine a large spaghetti bowl type freeway system all hovering over a very wide river. Yikes.

Fortunately I thought I knew where I was going. Fortunately, I thought right. Unfortunately there was no parking to be had at the college. Zilch. Nada. Not even for ready money. Unfortunately, I was ten minutes late at this point.

Fortunately, I found what I really hoped was a free permit-free, non towing spot on the curb. Fortunately I happen to rock at parallel parking. I think I parked that car on sheer will and desperation, because damn it was a tight spot.

Unfortunately I had to lug twenty pounds of computer equipment over a block, uphill. Everything turned out all right in the end and class even let out early- Hooray!! (I still get paid the full two hours.) But wow, I am totally frazzled.

Here is how I would like my evening to go: Perhaps, fortunately James will not have any potty accidents. Perhaps he will not lose my phone and my keys while I blog instead of watch him. Perhaps he will even heat up his own dinner and put himself to bed in a few hours.

Perhaps I should go make dinner.

James and His New Friend

2009-03-24T10:45:00.001-07:00

James made a new friend yesterday. Unfortunately, his new friend wound up in the garbage twenty minutes later. That is because James' friend was a hard-boiled egg. I gave it to him in hopes he would eat it. James insists on peeling his own eggs- no easy feat for a two year old, and as a result usually winds up yanking the top off, leaving the bottom shell on, and trying to eat it out of its shell. (yeah, well, you try peeling it for him- it is not worth the fight, I promise you).

About five minutes into this process, he found his empty egg carton, and Ta Da! an idea was born. I turned around to watch James playing peek-a-boo with his half peeled egg in the carton. Then he started up a lively conversation with it, only half of which I understood. But I am sure Humpty-Dumpty understood it.

Then the egg became his baby. Then they played house together with a christmas tin, and drove in James' laundry basket. I don't actually let James run rampant around the house with food like this- well, ok, maybe I do- but I was distracted at first and then completely amused with his imagination.

Finally, I think they had a falling out because I walked out of the kitchen just in time to see James smash his egg flat on the table. Egg went into the garbage at that point, much to James' dismay. And thus ended a beautiful friendship, at least until I forget about this incident and give James another egg...

Three Words I Hate

2009-03-20T17:02:00.000-07:00

Have you heard about Obama's Special Olympics gaffe on the Tonight Show? Where he referred to his bowling skills as worthy of special olympics? Wow, surely not his finest moment. I read this article on CNN entitled Special Olympics takes on use of 'R' word, and I think they make an excellent point.

It reminded me of the two words that are commonly misused as slurs but that we all use anyway- myself included. And I really hate when I use them, but just can't seem to help myself. Here is a sampling "how gay is that?" and "wow, I am a retard" I really really don't think that the word 'gay' should be used to refer to something as stupid or dumb, but again, I can't seem to help myself. If I catch it before I say it, I hold back, but I am not very good at checking what I say. If I was, James probably wouldn't be running around now yelling "oh dammit!"

Isn't it funny how words such as gay and retarded started out as something completely innocuous, then took to meaning something else completely, and now are commonly used as slang? I find language simply fascinating.

Of course, I also hate the phrase "quit being so girly" or "you are acting like a girl" which is perhaps why I find myself saying in contemptible tones "typical male." Do we ever think about what we say and how offensive it can sometimes sound? Without intending to, everytime we use the word gay, retarded, or girly, contemptibly, we are in a small way tearing down a faction of society.

Now, I do find that as a society we are also very quick to take offense where none is intended- I certainly don't get after people every time I hear them making derogatory comments such as those. But at the same time, I think we should consider what we mean when we commonly drop "girly" as an insult. (okay, yes, that is the one i hate the most, and I NEVER use it.)

Dance Party Saturday

2009-03-17T13:02:00.000-07:00

Jay attempted to teach me to swing dance this weekend. Lessons are going...ok. I have no rhythm in my feet. Don't ask me why. I can play piano like nobody's business. I can keep time with music, but ask me to stomp my feet in a rhythm or clap my hands and I am always off a beat. Oh, and for years and years, I hated dancing. Probably because I felt stupid because I knew I looked terribly awkward.

At any rate, when I am in the privacy of my own home with my other half it is not so bad. Which isn't to say I still felt totally at ease, but...

Swing dancing is fun!! Jay has bravely decided to continue to let me stomp on his toes, and maybe someday I will actually turn it into coordinated dancing. I just think it is too cool that my husband knows and enjoys dancing.

Also if you have read some past posts about trying to teach me anything, you know how hard it can be...

On Saturday he taught me the basic four step, the barrel turn and the sweetheart's pose. And I still remember what they are called! Yea!! Of course while this was all going on, James was insinuating himself between us and saying "Dance? Dance?" He couldn't believe we weren't including him. So naturally I had to have a dance with him, which is composed mainly of him getting twirled through the air.

We had a lot of fun, dancing to Louie Prima. Maybe sometime when I am actually half decent at it, I will video tape us.

Louis Prima "Oh Marie"

I think I will have to take a lesson from my sister on posting videos here, because I couldn't figure it out.

The Ugly Duchess

2009-03-13T13:14:00.000-07:00

Ok, I am having waaay too much fun transcribing for an art history class. It is just so fascinating!! So I have decided to include a little art history moment in my blog to edumacate the masses (or the two or three people who read this). Today is…..

The Ugly Duchess

Try to imagine the effect this has in a darkened room, on an enlarged projector screen. Wow. I was horrified, and yet fascinated at the same time. I didn’t want to continue staring, but I couldn’t stop.

No one is sure who this is, but rumor has it, she was the inspiration for the duchess drawings in Alice In Wonderland.

Researchers have now determined she was suffering from a very rare form of Paget’s disease, a disease which gradually enlarges and shrinks bones, deforming them. Usually it affects people’s hips and lower body, but this woman is unusual in that it affected her face instead.

This picture is mostly thought to be a commentary on the efforts of older people to look young and youthful, taken to the ridiculous. Notice the low cut dress, displaying a rather wrinkly bosom. She is holding a rosebud, which is a symbol of youthfulness.

In the end, I find myself extremely curious about who she is. Did she go out in public? How did she feel about the hand fate had dealt her with this disease? Quite probably this didn’t develop until she was older. If I were going solely off of the artist’s interpretation, I would say she was quite intelligent and made the most of her life. I could almost imagine her making jokes about this painting.

In the end, I love this painting, but… I wouldn’t necessarily hang it in my house.

If anybody wants me I will be in my cocoon

2009-02-26T21:16:00.000-08:00

What a week!! James has been on and off sick- leaving me pondering every morning "should I or shouldn't I take him to daycare?" We had quite a bit of foul weather and snow on Thursday morning, which incredibly hampered everybody's way to school, winding up with me and half the students being late. But I had fun counting all the cars in ditches along the way ;)

But the two events that really took the cake was first when I wound up involved in a four car accident Wednesday afternoon. Physically, I was okay, and my car only got a couple scratches on its bumper. Emotionally, it really took a toll on me as two cars in the accident and people in the cars were somewhat damaged and had to be taken to the hospital. (Just the people, not the cars, they were towed.) As I was for a time the only adult on the scene in the midst of horribly hysterical teenagers, I was temporarily in charge. Yuck.

I didn't think it had taken quite the toll on me it had, until that night and the remainder of the week I kept having panic and anxiety attacks and acting really really strange. Loud noises would make me dizzy, and I mostly just wanted to be left entirely alone. Sometimes I wonder how Jay puts up with my rampant psychoticness....

But the piece de la resistance was Thursday evening. Or rather Friday morning. Take your pick. I woke up at 2:45 am to the sound of what I thought was gunshots, (later learned it was an explosion) and a megaphone saying "THIS IS THE POLICE, COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP!" Yikes!! I spent the next few moments wondering if I was awake or still dreaming. Then the megaphone came on again, and I decided, yep, this was definitely for real.

Jay was nowhere to be seen which of course added to my confusion and wondering just what the hell was going on. A few minutes later he came inside the house and informed me that the police and the S.W.A.T. team were in our complex trying to coax a man holed up in his town-home to come out. This had apparently been going on since about 10:00 pm that evening, when the young man apparently had a bad reaction to some medication?? and commenced firing shots into his neighbors home- a single mom and her two young children in bed. Fortunately no one was injured.

I was of course oblivious to most of it, having fallen dead asleep at nine. But explosions do tend to wake me up. Getting woken up in the middle of the night by the police on a megaphone is a new one for me. But as long as they are not coming after me, well, I guess it's fine.

Anyway, I would totally appreciate a nice, quiet, boring week, with no S.W.A.T. team, no traffic accidents, no horrible snow traffice, and no sick children. The sick child thing may be too much to ask for as I think James is coming down with his annual croup, but as long as no police are involved at 2 am, I think I can deal with that.

On following up with my resolutions

2009-02-23T18:32:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I actually follow up on my more altruistic resolutions. Remember how I wanted to volunteer? Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later, but I got sucked into the humane society where Jay works. I decided that since I had two hours between classes at work, it might be fun to walk dogs.

I should perhaps explain here that I like dogs, but only when they don't belong to me. I have doggy-sat for other people before and walked other people's dogs as well and it was always enjoyable. But I don't really like how noisy they can be, I hate what they do to my yard, and really don't like doggy smell. So mostly I just like dogs I can play with for awhile and then give back. Of course I also claimed to like other people's kids because I could give them back when I was done, and now look at me...

So far, I have been to an orientation, an interview, another two hour training, and have yet another one to attend this Saturday. Sheesh, being altruistic is hard work. Today I had to spend an hour working on the steps I learned at the previous training. These steps consist of feeding dogs treats and practicing leashing them.

I just wanna walk some dogs already!!

No Room For A Sneeze

2009-02-20T18:35:00.000-08:00

This blog title may sound somewhat familiar to some of you. It is the title of a book my sibs and I grew up with. Here is a brief synopsis:

A farmer and his wife have so many kids there is no room in their house. So they go ask the wiseman what to do. He tells them to bring the chickens into the house. They do that, then go back and complain again. This time he tells them to bring in the goat, then the horse, cow, pig, etc. Eventually when their house is completely overrun with chaos, the wiseman tells them to remove all the animals. Once this is done, they realize how peaceful and adequate their house really is in comparison with what it might be.

What does this have to do with me? You see, I spent the better part of this week looking at different apartments to rent- not because ours was too small, but because we are not entirely sure we can continue to afford living here, whilst paying the heating bill and managing to eat all in the same month.

*Word of Warning- Never live in a place with huge vaulted ceilings unless you are prepared to pay triple what you normally would in heating*

We went out looking at apartments on Saturday to start us off. The first complex we were pretty sure the manager was on meth-amphetamines. The second complex would have taken two months worth of salary just to cover the deposit, and I refuse to declaw our cats. By the time we came home from that, our home was looking pretty good.

I went out again on Wednesday between jobs. This time, I looked at at least four different places. I think I lost count after awhile. Some were fine, some were scary, and some were just totally impractical. Nothing we looked at had adequate storage for all our extra baby furniture, camping supplies, and all other excess baggage we are not ready to part with.

I think I really like our garage.

Also, none of the apartments had more than a few feet of counter space in the kitchen. I really just don't see how I could put my grandma's mammoth fruit dehydrator on the counter, or make assembly line enchiladas, or even cook anything besides a box of macaroni and cheese in the kitchens we saw.

Suddenly my tiny kitchen is looking quite spacious and lovely.

After looking at the last apartment for the day, the book No Room For A Sneeze just inevitably popped into my mind. I realized that perhaps moving into a smaller cheaper apartment may not be the best solution and perhaps where we are is really the best place for us right now. Although it would be nice to save 300 dollars a month on rent and heat (and actually have a warm house for once) it would take an extraordinary amount of resources to move again, even if it was just down the road. (six hundred dollars just for a cat deposit??? Come on, cats aren't that bad.)

Here is why I love my townhome:
1. I have a yard which is totally my own space and I can grow anything I want in it.
2. An excellent neighbor with whom I swap child horror stories and dinners.
3. A garage for all our STUFF.
4. A forest behind us to shield all the weirdos who live in the apartment complex behind us. (Someone pitched a tent and camped out there all summer, who does that?)
5. An extraordinarily cat-friendly environment- we had no extra cat deposit here, and all the cats are so nice they even share their fleas with us.

So, basically, I think we decided that if we really want to save our pennies, we should stay put and not pay well over 1500 dollars in deposits, not have to buy extra storage, and not have to pay reconnection fees for the cable.

I am glad it took several hours of apartment hunting and a childhood book to show me that.

Take Me The Way I Am

2009-02-16T14:42:00.000-08:00

This first blurb is totally unrelated but.... Hooray! Hooray!! James has finally used the toilet and today he even pooped in the potty for the first time!! I won't go into great detail, but I have never been so excited about seeing excrement in my life;)

Ok, onto the next matter of business. This is a belated Valentine to Jay, sorry it is a little late, but I just discovered this song and it struck a chord with me. I discovered Ingrid Michaelson on Pandora Radio, (I may be just a bit partial to her because of her name) and there are two songs of hers I really like. I have posted them here to give you a sampling. And I dedicate the song "Way I Am" to Jay who really does take me just the way I am.

"The Way I Am"

"Breakable"

Who Does This Sound Like?

2009-02-12T21:22:00.000-08:00

We are attempting to potty-train James now. Or rather, my babysitter claims she succeeded in potty-training James, but I have yet to see him go in the toilet at home even once. Sometimes I think she makes this stuff up..

But I love her anyway.

A couple of days ago James and I were fighting over underwear. I wanted him to wear them instead of a diaper and he quite vocally refused. I insisted, and, sort of, won. Five minutes later I took him potty where he completely refused to take off the same underwear he didn't want to wear in the first place!!! I realize I shouldn't look for logic in a two-year-old. He is just trying to assert his independence.

Every day James grows more and more like his mother. Be afraid folks, be very afraid. He can and does scream for an hour. He doesn't like anything if it is not his idea. And most of all, he doesn't like other people to show him how to do something.

This reminds me greatly of the times my dad tried to coach me in softball.

Dad: Throw the ball like this, Inger-Lis.

Me: I know! I am throwing it like that!! Besides I want to do it my way!!

Dad: Make sure you swing your bat in a straight line.

Me: I know! I am swinging in a straight line, just like I threw the ball perfectly. I can't help if you can't catch it.

Or we could fast forward to last year when Jay taught me how to ride the scooter...

Jay: You have to go faster to get the scooter to stay straight.

Me: I know! But then I will fall off.

Jay: You won't fall off if you speed up.

Me: I know! Just let me do it.

Jay: You need to press down with your leg to turn it.

Me: I know! But I would rather stop, get off, and just walk the scooter around the corner, ok??

I think you get the idea...

I tried to teach James how to pedal his tricycle this week. His feet are finally long enough to reach the pedals and he is coordinated enough. He could really move on that thing if he could use the pedals. So I put his feet on them and showed him how to pedal.

He looked at me as if to say "I know, Mom!" Although he caught right on to the idea, he then returned to using his feet on the ground to propel him forward.

Mom and Dad, I give you permission to laugh your heads off at me.

Don't You Wish You Were My Neighbor?

2009-02-07T16:53:00.000-08:00

Pardon my ego for a moment, but I just have to flaunt my cookie making talents.

I made these, and I think they are oh so pretty. Yesterday I was looking for ideas for a valentine themed dessert because we were invited over to a Sunday dinner, and I just HAD to make something cute and special. Somewhere along the way I discovered ganache. Ganache is chocolate pieces melted into heavy whipping cream and can be used for frosting, truffling filling, or eclair type stuff, and DAMN is it good!

Whipping up the sugar cookies was the easy part. Ganache is pretty quick to make, but kind of temperamental- I made white chocolate ganache which was a little runny, and dark dark chocolate ganache which was too thick to spread. In the end I just combined the two and made a very yummy milk chocolate ganache.

I think my mistake with the chocolate was that I followed the note that said "a good way to find out if your chocolate will make good ganache, is to determine if it is good to eat out of hand." I would probably eat pure cocoa beans out of hand, if you gave them to me. I picked 60% cocao chocolate chips which turned out to be heavenly for me, but way too rich for anyone else.

If I could just bake all day, and have someone else do all my dishes, I would be in heaven. I am trying to convince Jay to open a bakery with me. I could all the baking, he could do the business end, and James could wash all the dishes and sweep the floors. Nothing better than cheap child labor!

I envy turtles

2009-02-02T21:04:00.000-08:00

Hmmm, what should I blog about today? I could tell you the exciting story of how James puked all over the cat yesterday (something I am afraid the cat will never forget), or how the dinner fairy showed up on my doorstep with a homecooked meal tonight, OR something that I have been both simultaneously dreading and excitedly anticipating. I had to ride the scooter. Or rather, I GOT TO RIDE THE SCOOTER!! It's such a two edged sword with me. Although I have practiced riding the scooter, I have never actually driven it to a specific place as a means of transportation, but since Jay has been seriously sick lately, I let him take the car to work while I drove the scooter down the road to the middle school I tutor at.

The first thing I noticed after wobbling out of our driveway was that there were no seatbelts. The second thing I noticed was just how soft and vulnerable my little body is compared to all the metal and plastic cars that were whizzing by me. I felt a bit like a lobster or turtle out of its shell. I longed for the protective casing of metal and fiberglass of a car surrounding me.
But whoa check out the speed and the wind in my hair, and I am just too cool for words on my little scooter!

I think the highlight of my trip may have been the looks on my kids faces when I walked into the school where I tutor. Their jaws just dropped when they saw the helmet. "Oh my gosh, teacher, you have a motorcycle?!!"

"No," I proudly replied "I have a SCOOTER!" I could tell they were impressed.

Now I just need a pink helmet with flames along the side.

If You Can't Laugh at Yourself, Who Can You Laugh At?

2009-01-29T20:32:00.000-08:00

I just found this article on CNN talking about an apparently popular blog (I had never heard of it, but that is no surprise) called Stuff White People Like. Is it mildly offensive? Perhaps. Is it funny? Definitely. I think people who can't laugh at themselves once in awhile have no sense of humor. Basically it is mocking the culture of middle class white people. Ok, so while my income may not be of middle class level, I do consider myself to be a part of it, due to upbringing, tastes, and education. And I think this website is hilarious. Out of 120 things (and growing) that white people like, here is what just screamed my name-

Landmark Today!

2009-01-25T12:06:00.001-08:00

Ok, here is my disclaimer: For those of you who are not interested in the ravings of a hopelessly smitten mommy, do not read on. You will not be interested.

For all those who are left reading: I gave James his first cooking lesson today!! I have waited for this moment from the day I learned I was pregnant. I. Love. To. Cook. And I want to share the fun with any inquisitive little person who will help.

I woke up this morning and just knew it was a pancake day. It is Sunday after all, and I was very hungry. After getting James up, I proceeded in the general pancake direction. James is now of the age where he doesn't want to be left out of anything, so when he saw me in the kitchen, he pulled up his little stool and situated it right next to the bowl. (ah, the stool, with that little stool, James can be so independent, but he can also get into sooo much trouble. The stool and I have a love/hate relationship.) Then he proceeded to pull out a very dirty spoon from the sink, and headed for my pancake mix. AHHHHH! (I say AHHHH! alot when James is in the kitchen,)

I decided then and there that at the age of 2 and three months James was ready to be my new kitchen assistant. So I handed him a clean spoon, and let him go to. All in all, things went very well. There were no bowls over-turned, no flinging of batter, and no temper tantrums. And James behaved pretty well too.

I guess it is not the absolute first time James has gotten to help in the kitchen. Apparently he helps his sitter make cookies once in a while too. But this is a landmark occasion for me, as I plan to have James be a world class chef by the age of 10. Or at least be able to make me dinner.

And for those of you who have seen Jay's blog recently, James is also going to be a head-banger in a rock and roll band.

My Collection Is Nearly Complete!

2009-01-24T12:17:00.000-08:00

I went to the goodwill to other day to pick up some good reads for finals week next week. (I get to sit around for 1 1/2 hours and watch kids take their finals) and I found one of my most favoritest feminist books! It is called Women Who Run With Wolves. Basically, it takes different myths and stories about women from different cultures and analyzes them psychologically. Of course I had to buy it, it is one of those books I just pick up idly and wander through at will, with no thought to reading chronologcally. After I got home, I realized seemed to be starting a collection on feminist literature. Thus far, I have The Feminine Mystique, Dance of the Dissident Daughter, and now Women Who Run With Wolves.

Although I do have to take some of the things I read in these books with a grain of salt, (no I have never danced around a campfire, and probably never will) ultimately they help me out when I am feeling a little down on myself, or inferior to the world at large.

Yesterday I read a review about a new book, that I would absolutely love to read! It is called Feel Good Naked, and it is all about accepting yourself for who you are, and not who you wished you were. Oh boy do I struggle with that one. Anyway, I had to raise an eyebrow at the picture that accompanied the interview with the author- it showed a silhouette of a woman who obviously didn't have any weight issues,- long skinny legs, nipped in waist, etc.

I have a feeling the book's author didn't pick out that picture.

Anyway, I just thought I would share three of my favorite books to all those out there who want to get in touch with their feminist or wolfish selves.

It's Gardening Time!

2009-01-17T11:27:00.000-08:00

One of the classes I transcribe for is a horticulture class. The students spend most of their time planning out a garden with vegetables, fruits, flowers, etc. Well, since I didn't have any typing to do during that time, I wanted to plan out MY OWN garden. And I actually have a yard now!!

I have had a garden since I was the ripe old age of five. My dad, the ex-farmer that he was, liked to have gardens everywhere we lived, and I think that must have rubbed off on me. I don't remember if it was his idea, or if I just drove him crazy enough, but one day he leased out a spot of his vegetable bed to me and my sister.

I planted alyssum, red potatoes, and gladiolas. And I still remember what I planted in my very first garden, over twenty years ago. I can't remember the day to day details of my life, or where I put my car keys, or to take my computer charger to work with me (that was an awful moment), but manohman do I have a memory for plants.

I loved my garden. The alyssum was my favorite I think because it smelled sweet, but I loved the glads and the potato too. Then the worst thing happened. My dad dug. up. my. potato. He thought it was a weed. And I still frikkin' remember this. But, I have a lot of respect for him because he told me about it. If I had dug up little James' most precious plant, I probably would have blamed the cats.

Anyway, that first garden was enough to get me hooked. As we moved to house after house, I would wait for my dad to establish his garden turf, and then either share or pick my own little spot. Having little regard for vegetables, I mostly grew flowers or strawberries.

You know how teenage girls quite often spend all their money on clothes or make-up, etc? Well, I blew all my cash on plants. And I would wheedle plants out of my mother. Then, when I realized that you can't grow things in winter, I started an indoor plant collection. At one time, I had a Boston fern that reached from the ceiling to the floor.

I guess it's no wonder I eventually received a degree in horticulture, but it took me about 5 years of college to come to that conclusion.

Anyway back to the present. I grew a few things last year in my yard. The nasturtiums looked spectacular until the aphids got to them, and my cherry tomatoes were prolifically out of this world. THIS YEAR I am being a bit more organized. I have improved my soil, learned how much sun I have, and pretty much killed all the grass from neglect.

I am ready to plant some veggies.

After dreaming for years of having my own space for a whole growing season, I have a pretty good idea of what I want. I don't want to grow anything I can get at the grocery store for cheap. I want purple, red, and yellow carrots. I want swiss chard. And I think I will also experiment with artichokes and sweet potatoes. Oh yes, and of course lots and lots of basil and tomatoes.

I may grow some strawberries in my strawberry pot. I also need to design my shady backporch space.

I have also become a very cheap gardener. Part of that is money constraints, part of that is the challenge. I learned in one of my classes in school that you can buy a grocery store sweet potato, cut it up into small pieces and grow several plants. I so have to try that. I will also have to try growing my own ginger and horseradish from grocery store plants.

I am a strong believer in taking cuttings and root starts from other people's plants and growing my own. Whether they know what I did or not. I could go on and on about all the things I want to do in my yard the size of a postage stamp. Compost, Thai basil, ferns, hostas, etc. but I think I can see my blog follower's eyes beginning to glaze over. Not everyone gets as excited about compost as I do.

I will keep this blog updated though on my successes and not so successes throughout the gardening season. Happy Gardening!

2009-01-16T15:25:00.000-08:00

I think one of my favorite gadgets on my computer's homepage has to be the Discovery News widget. Every day I can peruse it to see new scientific advances, who went extinct today, and who was recently exhumed from the grave

Yesterday I read this article, about the possibility of invisible cloaking material. I have to admit I was pretty fascinated. I continued to be fascinated by the idea for the rest of the evening and today, with thinking about everything I would like to make invisible.

1. Head Gear was the first thing that came to my mind. I don't know why, I never had to wear head gear braces as a kid, and I don't even think orthodontists still use them.
But, come on, if you have ever seen a teenager who had to wear headgear, you know you felt totally sorry for them.

I realize head gear is probably about the most random thing one could think of in regards to invisibility. I can't help what goes on inside my head, people.

2. This led me into the idea of make-up concealer. What better way to conceal that awful zit the size of my big toe, than to conceal it with invisibility?

3. Next my line of thought led me into even better reasoning. If one could conceal zits, what else could be concealed with invisibility? How about love handles??? Or all those other wobbly bits we all hate? Way more comfortable than control top nylons or girdles. Just add a couple strips of invisibility lining to your sides, throw on that bikini and wow!

I really really want invisibility strips. Especially after all the m&ms I just ate while writing this.

My Saturday of Disrepute

2009-01-10T14:57:00.001-08:00

I guess I should start out by saying, for those of you who are wondering, my week went great!!! I am really enjoying my new job, picking out nice clothes each day, and learning really cool stuff from the classes I transcribe for. Yea!!! Working full time is also really good for my ego. I feel much better about myself this week than I have in months.

Anyway, onto my Saturday. The whole gang just came back from the Oregon Food and Wine Festival. We only spent about 1 1/2 hours there, there really wasn't much to see. Here were the highlights of our visit:

1. Off roading through a puddle the size of a lake. I loved Jay's comment on that "if this is all I do today, it is time well spent."

2. Conned the Catholics out of a lollipop for James- I think they could tell I just didn't have a lick of interest in their preschool (no pun intended) but how can you say no to a two year old? They were oddly reluctant to hand the lollipops out.

3. I think I insulted a nun. I am not sure if she was a nun, but she was running the Mount Angel Abbey concession. I just asked if the Abbey was still running, and she looked absolutely horrified that I would even ask. Hey, I am kinda new to the area. I wasn't going to add to the insult by asking if she was a nun, she probably would have put a Catholic curse on me.

4. But the absolute best part was when we drove off without paying for parking. There was no sign that parking was three dollars. No one stopped us when we came in, they just kind of stared. As we left we saw people paying, so Jay waited until they were distracted and pulled out. Freakkin' awesome. I have to say though paying three dollars to park in a gravel lot to see a rather bland festival is just a rip off.

Overall, we were very disappointed in what was available there. This whole region of Oregon has a tremendous amount of Mom and Pop operations for cheese, dairies, wineries, orchards, etc, but really there was not much to see. I was expecting a variety of jams, maybe some buffalo meat, and an assortment of very soft cheeses. All they really had were wine samplings and SHAM-WOW. Has anybody else heard of SHAM-WOW? You aren't missing much.

If I had actually paid for tickets I would have been extremely disappointed, but Jay got some from work for free, and hey since we didn't pay for parking, it was quality family time well-spent.

A New Year

2009-01-01T22:23:00.000-08:00

Some people think that New Year's Resolutions are silly. I happen to be one of those people. I guess I just feel that if you want to turn over a new leaf, change your life, make '09 your bestest, skinniest, richest year ever, (according to Women's Magazine) you should take a cue from Nike and 'just do it' without waiting for January 1st to roll around.

I am also very cynical.

However, I do feel that I am starting a new life in many ways this year. In some ways, I feel that I have come full circle, right back to where I was in January last year. That is, embarking on a new, exciting career, from which I hope to gain happiness and fulfillment. Or at least a nice check twice a month.

I do think this time around, I am a little bit wiser, little bit skinnier, quite a bit poorer, and more medicated than I was this time last year.

So, as I have finished my training, will be working full time, will be dressing rather nicely on a daily basis, and will have to get my butt in full organizational, working-mom mode again, I suppose it would be appropriate to share some of my desires for the direction of my life to take. (I just can't bring myself to call them New Year's Resolutions)

1. I want to volunteer- either at Oregon Gardens, a women's shelter, or possibly the YMCA

2. Find a weekly exercise class to join, and continue to work on weight loss.

3. Get some serious stress-management skills, be it meditation, yoga, or just learning to take a deep breath, before I blow up at my family.

4. Do little things on a daily basis to keep my house cleaner, so I don't completely freak out once a month and practically kill myself trying to clean the entire place.

5. Eat healthier, but also eat more cookies. In other words, eat more fruits and vegetables, and indulge occasionally without guilt. I think indulging without guilt is a very good thing.

If I was going to make little nit-picky goals, I suppose they would be:

1. Organize my yarn, possibly by weight, or use, or ideas to use them. I haven't decided yet, but the pile is getting kind of ridiculous.

2. Quit biting my cuticles. It just wouldn't be the new year, if I didn't resolve to to quit this ongoing habit. (I have been trying to quit picking at my fingers for at least a good 15 years now) I am picking at them even as we speak.

3. Eat breakfast.

4. Play more piano.

5. Finish leftovers before they go bad.

So I guess that's it. My goals for this year, and life in general. If anyone has any suggestions for not biting fingernails and cuticles, I would love to hear them, because I have tried everything from taping my finger tips to painting them with clear nail polish. And man are my cuticles a mess.

2008-12-22T13:40:00.000-08:00

Today was the day I finally had to unearth the car. After having probably about a foot of snow fall on it, then rain turning that snow into ice, then more snow, I had about six inches of nothing but ice to crack through. It was not a job I was looking forward to, which is why I haven't touched the car for three days.

Three days of cold, wet, snow, and a crazy toddler, and about a billion Christmas things to accomplish still. Three days doesn't sound like much, but since it has been snowing here pretty much nonstop for a week, we have mostly been in each others unrelieved company for that long.

So today, between the desperate need to see a doctor, and the need to physically vent some frustration, I unearthed our car. It took me about 45 minutes. First I attacked it with a broom. Then when plastic pieces of my broom were getting mixed in with the snow, I moved on to a shovel. I have to admit it was kind of fun to watch these huge chunks of ice come sliding off the hood.
It is absolutely crazy out here.

Apparently Salem never sees this much snow. That makes sense, because I haven't seen a single snow plow. In Utah, this kind of snow is expected and wouldn't really be a problem. Here, the world has come to a grinding halt. The post office is finally open today, after no mail since Thursday.

If I owned a snow shovel, I would go out and shovel off our walk. However, I am still hoping it will melt in a couple of weeks.

Lately I have been finding myself day dreaming of the Sahara Desert. I would kill for a blast of dry hot air, with the gritty feeling of sand in my hair.

I also made tons of cookies, planning to send them to deserving friends and family. But I haven't been able to mail them yet. So far I have eaten two box fulls. Mom and Dad, I am trying to make it to the post office today, because your box is next. If you get a couple of gingerbread men with their heads bitten off, that is why.

Sorry if this is not my most creative post. My brain has turned to mush with all this crazy weather.

Bunny Food

2008-12-12T22:45:00.000-08:00

I am mostly grouchy this week. Therefore I have not much to say, except to expound upon the soothing power of sugar. Yesterday at exactly 7:16 pm, I realized what I was craving. I had been thinking upon this subject for quite sometime, having not been able to lay my finger upon what it was my body needed. Then, it struck me- carrot cake. No I was not struck by a carrot cake, although that would have been yummy. I realized my life would not be complete unless I had a huge carrot cake with pineapple and coconut and cream cheese frosting sitting in front of me screaming "EAT ME!" Of course this had to be homemade carrot cake. I think I surely must burn more calories if I cook my sugar before I eat it.

Unfortunately I had no pineapple. Or cream cheese. I could have improvised and made a simple carrot cake. But dammit, I wanted pineapple in my carrot cake. Lucky for me I have a husband who likes to make trips to the store for me. What a guy. By 10:30 I had carrot cake, completed and frosted. I had carrot cake for breakfast this morning. And lunch. And every snack in between.

Is it any wonder I am grouchy? By dinner time all I wanted was a salad.

Anyway, one of these days I WILL start to exercise again.

Pocoyo!

2008-12-06T17:42:00.000-08:00

I recently discovered the most adorable children's show on Netflix's Watch Now instant viewer. It's called 'Pocoyo.' Has anyone else heard of it? I simply found it by accident and now it is a favorite of our whole family. (Yes, both Jay, and I, and James will all huddle around the laptop watching Pocoyo) It is extremely simple- not much background, just a little boy who looks like Hello Kitty, with his friends, an elephant, duck, dog, and sleepy bird. They play against a white backdrop while a narrator who sounds just like the narrator from Winne The Pooh talks to Pocoyo. It is sooo cute. I know it's not produced in the U.S., but I am not sure if it's English. I think it may have been translated from another language (possibly Spanish?) into English. (Real British English, not American English.) James absolutely loves it- I ask him if he wants to watch Pocoyo, and he runs all the way upstairs to find the laptop, yelling 'poco!' So if little kid shows are your thing check this out. Pocoyo 'Don't Touch'

My Midnight Moral Dilemma

2008-12-03T21:11:00.000-08:00

At exactly 12:00 midnight on Tuesday Jay called me to say that our car had overheated and he needed me to pick him up after he dropped it off at the repair shop to be looked at in the morning. He'd been working on it all evening, and finally decided to take it out for a test drive. I wasn't asleep either though. We are both kind of night owls. Next I was faced with the dilemma of
A. Should I leave James sleeping in his crib and lock all the doors? OR

B. Wake him up, and take him with me to the not so nice part of town where the auto shop was located?

On the one hand, if I chose A, I would be risking leaving my child alone in a house at the mercy of possible abduction, fire, earthquake, carnivorous rabid raccoons, etc, etc. However, I would not have to wake him up. That's a big plus to me.

On the other hand, if I go the B route, I risk possible car-hijacking with my son in the back seat, and I would have to wake him up and then put up with a cranky child the next day. But at least we'd be together.
In the end I decided to keep the family unit together and take James with me. The next moral dilemma was even tougher. What is my weapon of choice for driving into Gangsterville at midnight? Here are my options: Jay's hand gun, my bayonet knife, and my pepper spray.
Okay, I don't actually know how to load Jay's gun, and the legality of carrying a loaded weapon in my car is kind of a gray area for me. So the gun stayed home. Knife- too slow and messy. So pepper spray it is!

I have had this fantasy from years past when I first started buying pepper spray (the current canister is number 3 I think). Suppose I were jogging along, with spray in hand, and some thug jumps out in front of me. Here is what I would do- I would yell "Suck Mace!!" spray him in the face, kick him where it counts, and run like hell. The catch phrase "Suck Mace" is especially important to me. I have never had the chance to live out this fantasy.

Anyway back to reality. I scooped up James and deposited him in his car seat, locked all the car doors and put my pepper spray on the hair trigger setting and set it in my lap, and went off to get Jay.

Have I ever mentioned how paranoid I can be?

I pulled up to a stoplight and a couple of hoodlums were eyeing my ride from the corner. I showed them what I was packin' and they decided this was one bad-ass chick they didn't wanna mess with.

Okay that never happened. I have been reading too many Stephanie Plum novels lately.

The pick up went off smoothly. We came back home and I decided whilst standing in the driveway to fire off my spray just to see if it still worked. I held it out at arms length and pulled the trigger. Nothing happened. I pressed it again- nothing. It took me a good 5 or 6 tries before I figured out the trick to it. Apparently there is a trick to it. That hair trigger is not as hairy as I thought. This caused me to rethink my fantasy. How potentially embarrassing to yell "Suck Mace!" and then have nothing happen. I have been carrying around this false sense of security for the past three years. Well now I know. So watch out all you perps, because I have mace and NOW I know how to use it!

Wow, Two Posts In Less Than 24 Hours... I Am Doing Good Today

2008-11-25T23:19:00.001-08:00

RBK tagged me with a meme (what is a meme? I don't really know) and I thought I had better get to it before the holidays get to me. We are leaving tomorrow evening sometime. Here are the rules, and all five people on my blogging list are getting tagged. You know who you are. I guess technically there are six, but RBK got to Spokesnspin first. I figured I had better get on here quick before Dad wrote his and used all the links I am going to use. He has more contacts than me anyway.

1) Link to the person who tagged you.
2) Post the rules on your blog (copy and paste 1-6).
3) Write 6 random things about yourself (see below).
4) Tag 6 people at the end of your post and link to them.
5) Let each person know they have been tagged and leave a comment on their blog.
6) Let the tagger know when your entry is up.

Six Random Things About Me,
By Inger-Lis
1. I don't like to eat anything that looks like a person or animal, like gingerbread men, animal cookies, gummy bears, etc. If eating said items are unavoidable, I bite their heads off first so they don't suffer. Oh, but eating food that looks like insects are okay.

2. I. Love. Yarn.

3. When I was working my way through college, I had a job as a janitor in the Biology building. This was by far the creepiest place I ever worked. There were specimens of reptiles, rodents, and insects everywhere, live and dead, and upstairs there were cadavers. ( I didn't have to clean that room thank goodness) I think some specialty cockroaches must have escaped because nearly every day I had to battle nearly three inch long roaches. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww

4. I hate killing spiders and bugs and would prefer instead to simply observe them, and place them outside. I used to own a tarantula and would walk around with him on my shoulder. Mostly just to creep out my family. Does this count as two random things?

5. I make wonderful chocolate gingerbread cookies.

6. I am a plumbing goddess. Yeah, okay that doesn't sound very glamorous, but I have fixed sundry faucets, shower heads, toilets, and leaky sinks using only my own smarts and some wrenches. This is because I don't do a very good damsel in distress either and get tired of waiting for someone else to fix it.

Now comes the hard part, creating links...
Jay- Okay this is problematic already. Jay's blog is private, so if you are already a member you can read it. If not send him a request. He's a pretty nice guy. I wouldn't have married him if he wasn't...
Tommy and Sheryl Apparently everyone I know has a private blog except for me. Tom is the brother I had all my adventures with as a kid, (and as a big kid too). Sheryl is his lovely wife, and they share a lot of similar interests of my own. Such as too many hobbies, the natural world, and setting off really loud fireworks.
Liz and Matt Liz, my older sister and her husband Matt who just moved to Vegas. Yea! Now I have somewhere new to travel to visit family!
Sarah My long-lost best friend growing up. I got in even more trouble with her than I did with Tommy.
Amy I suppose she is my cousin-in-law? I always enjoy reading her blog and views on the world. She thinks about things quite a bit the same way I do.

Now I am not sure which of all these blogs are private and which are not, but I am looking forward to seeing what they all have to say. They are all very interesting people and can come up with six fascinating random things I am sure.

It's Chocolate and Hives For Me

2008-11-25T10:48:00.000-08:00

I went to the store today. I went because I was out of dish soap. I came home with dish soap, popcorn, a can of frosting, powdered sugar to make more frosting, dutch chocolate snack pies, and a mocha frappuccino. Ahhhh, chocolate. I don't even want to know the calorie count on any of these... I have had a serious case of 'the munchies' as I call them for the past week. Carbs, chocolate, and sugary sweets seem to be calling to me even when I sleep. I was beginning to wonder if I have developed an addiction to chocolate, when I realized the root cause of my bingeing- stress. Ok, I am always stressed out. It's kind of second nature to me to worry about anything and everything even when I can't change it. It's when stress goes up a notch that I start to have problems. I also get insanely itchy when I am stressed and worried. Itchy to the point of hives. I had to take benadryl last night to get to sleep. So what the heck am I losing sleep over and probably on the point of gaining ten pounds for? I think it's Thanksgiving. Jay's parents are picking us up tomorrow evening and we are spending the holidays at Jay's sister's house. It's not that I don't like my in-laws. In fact, I really like all of Jay's family. If it was just me and Jay, I think I would be fine. The stress is the complication of throwing a toddler into the mix. I love seeing family, but I hate having a toddler over at a house where none of the stuff is mine. Because then I spend most of my time ensuring nothing priceless is broken. Oh, yes, I also have to make sure my child doesn't go vampire on any of his cousins and bite a chunk out of their respective skins. And then of course there is the issue of manners. I don't expect much in the way of manners from a two-year-old, but it is embarrassing nonetheless when he throws his entire plateful of food on the floor, or tries to hit me in the face. (No, I don't condone either behavior at home.) I don't expect perfection, but it would be nice if James made me look like a good mommy.

Jay has admitted he doesn't like going places with me and James. He likes going places with me, or James, but not us both together because I am bossy and harried, and James is impossible. He is right. But it seems everytime I relax, James does something outrageous, so I have to bounce back in 'Gestapo Mommy' mode. *Sigh* I just want this weekend to be over already.

My strategy for Thursday and Friday is to find a quiet place every so often and do my typing training. I can't afford to lose many days on that and when I make myself scarce James' behavior improves dramatically. Oh yes, and quietly repeat to myself every so often 'I'm a good mother, I'm a good mother, I'm a good mother..." (Did I mention I can be neurotically insecure at times?)

On A Happier Note...

2008-11-13T13:22:00.000-08:00

I am having sooo much fun with my laptop! I can sit in my late grandmother's rocking couch, relax, look out the window, and blog or play mahjong to my heart's content. Anyone out there a mahjong addict as well? I haven't played in years, but it's my favorite computer game (the only game I actually play) and IT CAME INSTALLED ON MY LAPTOP! Needless to say, when I discovered that, I was just over-the-top excited. As far as James and the laptop are concerned... mostly I just take it out when he is in bed. I don't know how this child became such a smart-aleck, but he has discovered that obnoxious kid habit of when I say 'Don't touch!' he very slowly reaches out and just barely touches my screen or keyboard and whispers 'touch'. He is two. Where did he learn this?

The whole point of this laptop was because of the job I will start in January. I will be transcribing lectures at a high school for a Deaf student in the class and we have to provide our own laptops. I am really excited about this job. In fact, it's probably the first job I have been truly excited about since I was laid off in May. It pays extremely well ($17 an hour, ok so maybe I shouldn't brag about that, but I have never made that much money before) and its just during school hours. I got it because I have mad typing skills and a college education. Hooray! I just knew all those years of school had to pay off eventually. Finally, my fast little fingers will be making me money. (Thank you to my grandma Lois and my parents for funding my piano lessons. I am convinced piano playing in my youth made me a fast typist.)

Currently I am training to learn their system of typing shorthand. Basically I have to learn one letter symbols for a whole bunch of different words, and then specialized software turns the symbols into words for the student reading on the other laptop. It's a pretty cool system. So I have until January to learn the method.

So between training, tutoring at a middle school, and serving banquets into the wee hours of the night, I will be a pretty busy person. Oh, and of course I have to squeeze some mahjong playing time in there somewhere too...

Life just isn't fair

2008-11-11T18:41:00.001-08:00

Today I am pondering the mysteries of life. This gets heavy, and possibly depressing. You have been warned.
A woman I barely knew passed away earlier this week. I only met her once, but I know a lot about her through my neighbor, whom she knew through a very convoluted relationship. Even though I only knew of her, I have been thinking about her and the family she leaves behind all week long. She was a good person, but had a very hard life and died young (46) leaving behind three teenagers, ages 12 and 13 (twins and one son). Their father is in jail. Mostly I have been thinking about her children and the life they are going to lead. I sincerely hope they turn out okay. They seem like good kids, but unfortunately I don't think they have very many adults who are really concerned for their well-being. I doubt their mother had very many people in her childhood to help her along and give her encouragement. Thus continues the cycle.

Most people think you get one shot at life and that's it. Some religions believe in reincarnation, but some do not. This is it as far as quite a few people are concerned. I have a really hard time accepting that idea, because so many people's lives just really aren't all that great. Some people may only know happiness once or not even at all in a lifetime. Others constantly live in a state of war and violence, or famine, or disease.

This brings me to the idea of God. I am not really sure what my views on the topic are. I think I have come to the conclusion that there may be a higher intelligence out there, but he or she seems to take a laissez-faire type of approach to us earthlings. I just cannot accept the fact that a loving God could allow such inequality among humankind. If he can, then I have a serious bone to pick with him.

I was taught that all people are born with the power to make their own choices, with something called free-agency. But I don't think very many people have the luxury of such choices. Consider a child raised in an inner city. The chances of that child getting into drugs, gangs, and dropping out of high school are pretty high. You could argue that it is still a choice, but I don't think it is much of a choice if you are raised to see illegal drugs as a normal way of making money and joining a gang a necessary way to survive. Or consider the family I was talking about earlier. How many choices did the mother really have in her life? Probably not very many that she could see or thought she was capable.

We like to boast that America is the land of opportunity, but I only see opportunities for those who are born into or above the middle class, or who have an extraordinary amount of drive, intelligence, and luck. The mediocre do not get anywhere. If they did, who would perform the menial labor the extraordinary citizens eschew?

People get pigeon-holed at a very young age. I saw this all the time when I worked in daycares. I hated that I thought this, but I could pretty much tell which children were going to succeed, and which ones were going to be arrested, on drugs, or pregnant before 17. It didn't have to do with temperament, it had to do with parenting, economic status, and how other people perceived them. Some kids were perhaps a little neglected, and tended to act up a bit. These children were quickly labelled as 'trouble-makers' by the teachers, a label that would of course follow them through different teachers as well. Other children weren't quite as cute, or cuddly, or bright as some others. They also tended to slip through the cracks. Unless something changes for these kids they will grow up with very low expectations of themselves and their abilities. They will continue to make bad choices, because they think those are the only choices they are capable of making. It makes my heart hurt just thinking about it.

I guess I am really a socialist at heart. Socialism has gotten a bad rap in the U.S. but its really not such a bad thing, when not taken to the extreme. I think everyone, regardless of ability should have the right to a successful, happy life. We castigate certain countries for having caste systems, but we have a caste system of our own here. Perhaps it is not legally in place, but it is in place in the minds of people very rigidly.

I want life to be fair. Maybe it is harder for me to enjoy my happiness knowing that there is suffering in the world. Knowing how fortunate I am doesn't necessarily make me grateful, it more often makes me mad that others will never know the kind of life I am living. And people, let me tell you, my life isn't all that great when compared to some others, but I am pretty darned happy with it. Lately I have really begun to appreciate the idea of reincarnation. I like to think that perhaps if someone gets the short end of the stick this time around, there is always next time.

I sit and look out upon all the sorrows of the world, and upon all
oppression and shame,
I hear secret convulsive sobs from young men at anguish with
themselves, remorseful after deeds done,
I see in low life the mother misused by her children, dying,
neglected, gaunt, desperate,
I see the wife misused by her husband, I see the treacherous seducer
of young women,
I mark the ranklings of jealousy and unrequited love attempted to be
hid, I see these sights on the earth,
I see the workings of battle, pestilence, tyranny, I see martyrs and prisoners,
I observe a famine at sea, I observe the sailors casting lots who
shall be kill'd to preserve the lives of the rest,

I observe the slights and degradations cast by arrogant persons upon
laborers, the poor, and upon negroes, and the like;
All these-all the meanness and agony without end I sitting look out upon,
See, hear, and am silent.

Walt Whitman

Top Ten Reasons Why I Love Oregon

2008-11-04T13:04:00.001-08:00

I may not be in a bloggy mood lately, but I am in a listy mood. I also like to make up words like listy and bloggy. We have been loving Oregon even before we moved here, and today I just added yet another reason. So for all you folks who think we should move, consider these goodies we get out here in the rainy Willamette Valley...

10. Just found out today there is no safety inspection required to get cars registered! Hooray! My car is falling apart and I can delay fixing it for another few weeks!!! ( The plates also expired in October, yeah, we are a little behind.)

9. No sales tax. On anything. Which is a huge deal when you've lived in Utah, where they tax everything.

8. The ocean is only an hour away.

7. The casino is only 15 minutes away ;)

6. Everything grows out here, even dead sticks sprout occasionally.

5. The fall color is un-be-liev-able right now.

4. The rain. I can't quite explain just how cozy and calming pouring rain makes me feel, but its been raining steady for three days now and I am happy as a clam.

3. Trees. Trees. And more trees.

2. The sound the forest behind my house makes when the wind is blowing. It sounds just like the ocean.

1. The best thing of all -- NO SNOW!! Not only is there no snow (well hardly any snow) but the winters are mild and so are the summers. To me, that is perfection right there.

Oh, and just a side note here, I voted last week through the mail.

What I've Been Up To

2008-11-02T13:49:00.000-08:00

I haven't been feeling very bloggy lately. Too much stuff going on to be creatively writing. But just to clue you in on my goings on, here is what I have been up to lately-

Today- Made oatmeal bread ( I love making bread, its like playing with playdough with a purpose), and printed off a muffin recipe collection. I have been a little obsessed with muffins lately. I found recipes for gingerbread muffins, peanut butter muffins, carrot muffins, and a few more. I'll update this later if any turn out to be really good. (Minor tidbit about my rampant nerdiness- I read recipe books like novels, and love love love to look up recipes online.)

Yesterday- Recovered from halloween, and sent my child to a sugar detox facility. BOUGHT A LAPTOP!!! Why did I buy a laptop? Because I landed an awesome job that requires my own laptop!! Its green, really green. I have been in love with the spring green dell laptop for at least a year now.

I have also been thinking lately about all the things I want to do in life, before I die. Or before I get too old and decrepit to want to do any of them.
1. SKYDIVING! Yes I really do want to go skydiving. Just once.
2. Fight for a cause- go to a rally, or a strike, or burn my bra...
3. Surf
4. Learn how to swim
5. Find a career I love and make a difference in the world
6. Learn Spanish and use it.
7. Live abroad
8. Grow goats and sheep, and spin their wool into yarn, and then dye said wool using natural ingredients, then weave or knit wool into something gorgeous.
9. Write a novel
10. Be a spunky feisty old lady

Am I Baby Hungry?

2008-10-28T16:59:00.001-07:00

Everyone (and by everyone I mean maybe 3 or 4 people, my social circle is small) has been telling me lately that when your child turns two, you usually start thinking about another one. And then I get asked if I have any plans for that. Mostly I scoff at these comments because they couldn't be further from the truth. After James was born, I swore I was done for the next five years. Yes you heard me right. Five years. Not only do I want my first child potty-trained, I want him out of the house. At least for three hours a day.

There is a new baby at James' daycare. I love this little guy. He is maybe barely 3 months old, and little, and squishy, and warm. And I get to hold him sometimes. I get my baby fix off of him. At least I thought I did. Yesterday I did something I never thought I would do. I made Anne Geddes' sleeping babies theme my google motif. Generally I think babies sleeping in teacups is strange and kinky, but as I was browsing for a new theme I saw the babies sleeping on lily flowers and did that little 'aahhh' thing women are so prone to. It was cute. And now its on my home page and I still think its cute.

So, if I am being completely honest with myself, then yes, I do crave to hold little babies again. I even kind of want to be pregnant again, just to see if its really as miserable as I remember it. The last time I was pregnant I was working and going to school full time, and pretty much clueless as to what I was doing. I also puked every day for nine months. Not fun. James is still cuddly, but he is definitely outgrowing the baby stage. I can see why this is the time when many families choose to have another child.

That said, whenever I think about having another baby, what comes to my mind are these hard truths:
1. The sleepless nights - beginning when I am too pregnant to sleep comfortably,
2. The depression, - note to self, I will never be pregnant or have another baby without prozac again.
3. The raging hormones (any slight hormonal change in me completely. screws. me.up.)
4. Being fat - I just lost 20 pounds, and am looking forward to losing 20 more, and I want to flaunt this new skinnier bod just a little bit longer. Ah vanity, vanity!
5. I want Money. Even though I have graduated from college, I have yet to start a career. And I really want one. Or at least the beginnings of one. Or at least get some student loans paid off.

The end of result of this discussion with myself is that while we do intend on having maybe just one more child, I think its still a few years off. Of course if I were to wait until James was about five or so, that would only be three years away. Wow, that's not so far off after all. So while I am definitely not ready to actually have another child yet, I am looking to see if there are any newborns for rent...

Anne Geddes Starting To Lose It...
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/34766

Two Women Running On A Beach, by Picasso

2008-10-25T23:56:00.000-07:00

I love this picture. I love the complete freedom in the women's movements. My inner child would love to run half naked on a beach too. But that will probably never be, (unless I make a trip to the south of France) so instead I look at this picture and pretend it is me.

My whosit and a whatsit now??

2008-10-24T13:32:00.000-07:00

They've been called mental lapses, old-timers, brain farts, and many other terms I know I have heard of, if only I could recall. Or as my sister puts it "Have you seen my this? It goes with my that, and it was just over there."
Today I learned that psychologists call it a 'prospective lapse.' I learned this while reading a very interesting article on CNN

http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/personal/10/24/o.midlife.memory.meltdown/index.html?iref=mpstoryview

This article describes me to a T. Except for one small detail. The author is describing adults in their 40s and 50s. I am 27. So what is my problem? I call it being absent- minded. Or just having too many random facts, ideas, opinions, and tasks crammed into my brain. Either way it is a serious problem for me.

Like today. I had a job interview this morning. I have known about it for two weeks. I have waited and waited for an interview with the school district. Finally they called! Oh hooray hooray they called at last! My interview was this morning at 10:45. Or so I thought. That is what I had been thinking all week as I anticipated it. At 10:00 am sharp, all dressed to kill, James at the ready to go to daycare, I retrieved the paper I wrote the directions and time on only to discover my interview was. at. 9:30. am. Oh. Shit.

Where did 10:45 come from? How could that possibly have been confused with 9:30? I don't know. All I know is that there was only one thing left to do. Grovel. Profusely. Which I did, and fortunately for me went in and interviewed at 11:00. And despite my mental lapse, the interview went well. Although if I were the interviewer and my interviewee forgot and then went later, I would be pretty skeptical of her employability potential. I hope they can forgive me.

This happens more and more frequently now. I am a compulsive list-maker, because I know the only way to remember anything is to write it down. I have a notebook that hangs out in my kitchen, where I write down everything in my head that I need to remember. Grocery lists, to-d0 lists, ideas for my yard, recipes, pretty much anything that comes to my mind that I am afraid I will forget. I really am just as likely to find my TV remote in the vegetable bin of my refrigerator as I am to find it in the seat of my couch. And there was a phase a few years back where I locked my keys in my car at least once a month. I am not kidding. Once I locked my keys in the front of the car, and Jay's keys in the trunk of the car. He wouldn't speak to me for the rest of the day.

Here is what I can remember:

Every song I ever learned as a child.

A poem about a flying cow I recited at a contest in third grade.

The botanic and common name of over two hundred different species of plant.

Most of The Pledge of Allegiance in Latin "Fidem meum obligo, vexillo civitateum..." is how it starts.

I can also spell just about anything.

Wow, that is all really useful stuff.

I like to joke that having a kid has turned my brain to mush. That's only partly true. I was pretty bad before I had him, but my absent-mindedness has gotten much worse since. I really need a personal secretary (or one of those nomenclator thingys that article mentions) to follow me around and basically run my life for me. I can't wait to see what my memory is like 20 years from now.

I'm gettin' my knit on

2008-10-21T13:07:00.000-07:00

Ok, this blog is about my prowess as a knitter. So if you care nothing for yarn, fibers, or my hobbies, you may want to stop reading. No really, its okay. My feelings won't be hurt. Its kind of like me not reading a blog about scrapbooking. (No offense to any scrapbookers out there, but given the choice between a colonoscopy and scrapbooking, I'd choose the former any day.)

Hooray for me, I finally finished my first sock!! I learned how to knit about three years ago (December 2005) and I am finally onto socks. It was fun. I think I like knitting socks. I may knit a whole passel of socks. Granted one sock isn't much use, unless you are like me and are just so proud of your sock that you wear it while you are knitting its mate. I think its my new lucky sock. Here is a picture of it.

I am a big fan of bright colors, can you tell?

The yarn I used is called "Flat Feet". Its quite a neat idea because it doesn't come in a ball of yarn, it is actually woven into a flat piece of fabric that has been tie-dyed. You unravel it as you go and watch the design turn into a multi-colored sock. Yes it's a new-fangled gimmick to get people like to me to impulsively buy yarn. It works well.
Its made of merino wool (which is my favorite of wools because it is sooo soft) with just a little bit of nylon for stretch.
I am especially proud of this sock because I had to start over on various parts of it at least four times. Mostly this was due to me leaving my knitting out for a certain curious toddler to find.
I started on its little socky mate yesterday, and hope to have a complete pair soon.

What'd You Do This Weekend?

2008-10-17T23:52:00.000-07:00

My Friday night... one toddler. who won't keep his diaper on. also happens to have the runs.

2008-10-16T11:27:00.000-07:00

I am sure we all heard about Joe the plumber by now. This line from Joe Biden though absolutely cracked me up. Thursday morning, Obama's running mate, Sen. Joe Biden, said plumbers would not be affected by the Democrat's tax policies. http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/10/16/joe.plumber/index.html?eref=rss_topstories
So all you plumbers out there can rest easy.

The Great Pumpkin

2008-10-15T21:46:00.000-07:00

Despite what the title suggests, this post is not about Charlie Brown, it's about how I got to go on my very first field trip as a parent! Last summer, twice a week I took between 16 and 20 preschoolers all over the Salt Lake Valley on public transportation. Words cannot describe my experiences. I think I have tried to block much of it out of my mind.
Today however I got to go with my son's daycare to the pumpkin patch down the road. And I was a parent. Not a teacher. It was still completely crazy. It started out crazy and it ended with us very nearly forgetting the baby in the pumpkin patch. Poor James' teacher. Having been in her shoes many times before, I really felt for her. James was also a complete pill and refused to walk most of the way, which meant I spent a lot of my time say 'ok, see ya later' and walking away. Ha ha, that works really well right now. But I suspect he is going to wise up any day now. I think he was more interested in the rocks in the gravel parking lot than he was in picking pumpkins.
Anyway, here are some pictures. I wish I had more, but it is so hard to get a shot of James' face outside because he is always walking or running ahead of me. He is a very busy boy.

(One disclaimer to the following pictures, I have a really hard time posting pictures, so these are squished together, and don't even think about asking for captions. These are open to interpretation.)

Isn't he just adorable? Being a parent is a funny thing I have noticed. As crazy as James can make me (and he is not even a teenager yet) I still think he is the greatest thing ever. I am completely smitten by him. I could look at these pictures all day.

2008-10-13T15:32:00.000-07:00

Thanks for all the crepe suggestions folks! We made them last night and they were superb. We also splurged and got some nutella. Mmmmmm.

2008-10-12T13:45:00.000-07:00

I know Jay will laugh at me if I post this. I think I am allowed a premade post once in awhile. I shortened it though, so the numbers are wrong. My creativity is lacking lately. Thank you to my SIL Sheryl for inspiring me;)
One word answers to the following questions:

1. Where is your cell phone? Toddler

2. Your significant other? Sexy

3. Your hair? Dyed

6. Your favorite thing? Plants

7. Your dream last night? Bunnies

8. Your favorite drink? Chai

9. Your dream/goal? Satisfaction

11. Your ex? Jail

12. Your fear? Drowning

13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Rich

15. What you’re not? Patient

17. One of your wish list items? Tattoo

19. The last thing you did? Kissed

22. Your pets? Fleas

24. Your life? Variable

25. Your mood? Content

28. Something you’re not wearing? ......Bra

32. Your favorite color? Red

33. When is the last time you laughed? Recently

34. Last time you cried? Recently

40. Vacation activity? Beach

42. Pet peeves? Fleas

43. Cookies? Chocolate Gingerbread

45. Favorite thing to do on a rainy day? Listen

46. Your biggest strength? Stubborness

48. Most awesome gift received? Baby

50. What do you collect? Yarn

51. Oldest kept item from childhood? Memories

52. Greatest indulgence? Pedicures

The Socialists Are Taking Over!! Run For Your Lives!

2008-10-10T20:22:00.000-07:00

I read this article on CNN news about 'rage on the McCain campaign trail' http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/10/10/mccain.crowd/index.html?iref=mpstoryview. All I could think about was how unintelligent most of the comments were that the enraged people were making. Kind of funny though. They are mad at McCain for losing.
It seems that the McCain campaign is really going down the toilet lately. The majority of people polled said Obama won the last debate, Obama is in the lead in the polls, and Palin was officially found guilty of violating state ethics laws. I absolutely love what the McCain campagin spokeswoman said in regards to that verdict "Gov. Palin was cleared of the allegation of an improper firing, which is what this investigation was approved to look into... [however] the Legislature exceeded its mandate in finding an ethics violation."
Oh good, so since the Legislature exceeded its mandate, we will just pretend an ethics violation never happened.
Its still a close election, and I won't breathe easy until Obama is sworn into office, but it seems he is getting closer.

Crepes, anyone?

2008-10-06T16:04:00.000-07:00

I saw my crepe pan today behind the fridge (which tells you how much I use it) and now I want to make crepes sometime in the next week or so. Anyone out there have some favorite crepe filling ideas? All I know how to do is fill them with fruit and whipped cream. I am thinking scrambled eggs and sausage perhaps, or something with beef. So I pose the question to my readers: What would you like in a crepe?

Hey Mom and Dad, I Betch Ya Never Heard This Story!

2008-10-01T13:29:00.001-07:00

I am getting tired of criminal background checks. I have been through at least three of them in the past couple of months whilst looking for a job. It is kind of insulting after awhile. I mean really, come on, I am the squarest of the square law-abiding citizens. I don't look like the bank robber, or child molesting type. So is this all really necessary?
I was feeling pretty picked on this week after having to be fingerprinted yet again. Then a couple of bittersweet and kinda funny memories flashed through my head. Yes I am a pretty square person but... I have been threatened with arrest (for valid reasons) twice in my life. My family can probably remember the first time. But I don't think anybody knows about the second time. To fill in those readers not familiar with my childhood, I got in a fight my senior year in high school. Not my finest moment, and I regret it every time I think about it, so we are not going to dwell on that here. But that was possible arrest numero uno.
The second time is a little more random. It was for vandalism at a National Park. I think I should add here that I have the highest respect for State and National Parks and don't even pick the flowers when visiting. This vandalism was somewhat unintentional, or rather I just didn't think it was a bad thing at the time.
A short time after dropping out of college at the ripe old age of 18, I moved down to Bryce Canyon National Park to work as a groundskeeper for the summer. There I met an interesting young man who would later become my first boyfriend. I was really into camouflage, Aerosmith, and survivalist skills at the time and he was a former Army Ranger and quite skilled at martial arts. Wow. One day after work he decided to teach me how to throw knives. I have always wanted to know how to throw knives. (Although I did learn, I have since forgotten and so will be unable to pass the skill on to my child. Too bad.) We used the post holding up my cabin porch as a target. It was large, soft-wooded and made a nice thunk when you hit it. It never even occurred to us that we might get in trouble for making large gouge marks in it.
A couple days later we were separately called in to the head boss's office. I got a nice 'talk' about the seriousness of what I had done, and then he started talking about how I could be arrested for it. Blah blah blah was about all I heard though. I did however have to sign an warning stating that I understood what had happened and if it happened again I would be fired and arrested.
It was so worth it.
And that is how I was threatened with arrest, twice in one year, actually. Looking back I wonder if the administration was maybe more afraid of the idea that we were throwing knives around a fairly populated place, rather than that we had vandalised a government owned wooden post.
I have since bequeathed my camo jacket to Andrew, who very much appreciated it, and most of my knives to other brothers. But I still have my twelve inch bayonet knife. Its my favorite. I use it to open boxes.

Friday Foto Fiesta

2008-09-26T00:41:00.000-07:00

I finally jumped on the bandwagon and yearbooked myself... or rather I made Jay jump on the bandwagon for me since he is the one who did all the work.

Me in 1976...

2008-09-24T20:49:00.000-07:00

I have a job. I HAVE A JOB. I have a job !!!! Admittedly it's much easier to add inflection and excitement to my voice rather than to my typing, but I have a J-O-B that will pay me in actual dollars. Technically I have two jobs that add up to forty hours a week, and they both will hopefully start in the next two weeks. So while my house may be dirtier from now on, my bank account will be a lot healthier, as will my outlook on life. Depression and unemployment are ugly things and make an even worse combination and I have been coping with both for two months now.
It's been an emotional roller coaster ride for me this week. First I was absolutely frustrated out of my mind because I just couldn't seem to find anything jobwise out here in podunk Salem Oregon. Then I interviewed on Tuesday for a position as an in-home care provider for a really sweet lady in a wheelchair. It would work out perfect with my afternoon tutoring gig and be a low-stress job which is really what I need right now. Yesterday I received the call that I was hired! Oh hooray, hooray! Words cannot describe my relief at having a full-time job again. All I had to do was jump through all the Oregon Department of Disabilities hoops to become registered and hopefully start on Monday.
I went down to accomplish that today and after waiting around for a good half an hour to see a caseworker, learned that I couldn't start working until I had cleared a background check. Which could potentially take up to a month. You have got to be kidding me. The current caregiver was planning on leaving next week at which point I was to take over and I just learned it is anywhere from two weeks to a month to pass a background check. At that point, my heart just fell into my shoes. I drove home in a semi-comatose state, and fortunately arrived there in one piece. I was terrified that with this news my employers would just hire the second person on their list because they needed someone now. Sudden bad news usually triggers anxiety and/or panic attacks in me, and my reaction this time was no different.
I pulled myself together however to let my employer (the woman's daughter) know this new situation. Her reply was 'that was ok, the family had picked me to take care of her mom and they would wait.' Wow, I really liked how she said the family picked me. Not just her, or her mom, but the entire family. Ooooh they like me.
So to recap, Monday and Tuesday I was hugely upset, frustrated, mad, etc, etc. Wednesday I was absolutely elated. Then this morning (it is Thursday right?) I went for panicked and devastated (I also very nearly got killed by a driver running a red light). So what is for tomorrow? I would personally prefer calm, cool, and serene. Ha ha, yeah right. That is not in my nature.

Dear Ms. Palin

2008-09-18T12:41:00.000-07:00

Dear Ms. Palin
You have taken something of mine and made it your own. I am here to say I want it back. Don't deny it, you know what I'm talking about. Yes, that's right, you stole my look. You know, that look, the one where your hair is swept up, yet still falling across your face in a careless 'let's get this out of my way 'cause I am busy here' kind of attitude. Ok, yes a lot of women do that with their hair. But that is not all you are guilty of, because you then went out and bought square wire-rimmed glasses. And now everybody thinks you are the original. But I know the truth. You just wanted to look like me. And since it is your face that has been plastered all over the media, whenever I wear my glasses and put up my dark brown hair in a messy ponytail, I feel like a Palin wannabe. And people are noticing.
Just to set the record straight, when I first heard you were McCain's running mate, I respected you. I would never have voted for you because I don't believe there is a single issue we agree on. But I respected the fact that you were the governor of Alaska, and I didn't mind sharing a common look. Then you opened your mouth, and I started minding. Then you began speaking unscripted and I am now seriously considering going blonde or shaving my head.
I can't style my hair, Ms Palin. This messy upswept look is actually due to a complete lack of any styling ability. You on the other hand are a former beauty queen, hair spray is like your best friend. Why you can't you be a little more Clintonesque, or go for the coiffed Laura Bush look?
Just think about it,
Inger-Lis

Forget Mondays, Tuesdays are the crappiest

2008-09-16T14:03:00.000-07:00

I am having kind of a hard day today. I think it started when the woman I interviewed with yesterday swore up and down she was going to call that night to let me know her decision. By 10:00 pm no call. I am not necessarily mad at her, things happen, I understand that. I will probably give her a call tonight. It was just such a promising position and I am thoroughly tired of being unemployed.
This morning I spent 45 minutes looking for my car keys. I am not kidding. 45 minutes no car keys. Ok, so what, its a nice day, I figured I could walk James down to daycare, save gas, get exercise, love the environment. Only the tire on his stroller was as flat as could be, and after ten minutes I realized that my air pump was not just slightly broken, but completely useless, and his other stroller was locked. in. the. car. FINE! I didn't really need to go anywhere today. I'm not afraid to stay at home with James. (Sometimes I am, but not always.) So I called his sitter and informed her no car keys, no stroller, staying home, unless said keys show up in the next half an hour. 20 minutes later, whilst I was upstairs cruising the internet for more job possibilities, James suddenly showed up in the hallway with my car keys in hand, and attempted to insert them into the electrical outlet. Don't think I hadn't asked him several times already where they were. I knew he was the last one who had them.
James went off to daycare, and I went off to the hardware store to make key copies and buy more electrical outlet plugs. I was feeling just a little frazzled when I came home and Jay called. Jay, as you could probably tell I was pissed off by the events of that morning and my overall unemployed state. I wanted to yell at someone, lucky you. I didn't yell, and I only acted a little bit immature thank you very much.
I spent some time killing fleas on the cats. Killing things can be very satisfying when one is mad. Then I went to wait by the phone because I had an appointment from Western Government College to call at 1:00 about their teacher certification program. I surfed the internet for jobs, and waited. I played around with Pandora Radio and waited. 1:10 came and went, no call. I wondered if WGU recruiters like to be fashionably ten minutes late for their phone calls. 1:20, no call. I went to my email to double check the appointment. It was for Wednesday, and it just so happens that today is Tuesday. I AM LOSIN' MY FREAKIN' MIND TODAY.
But seriously folks, could I just have a job... please?

Friday Foto Fiesta

2008-09-12T14:43:00.000-07:00

Oooh, what a cute little stinker up there. Do my parents reading this recognize this picture? Yes that's yours truly;) I recently received some of my baby pictures from my grandma last week and was pleasantly surprised to find out that hey James looks a little like me! And all this time I thought I had just spit out another LeVitre male two years ago. Not that there is anything wrong with that. (They are a pretty handsome bunch.) It just makes me a bit smug to know that James looks a little like me (minus my vicious temper and stubborn streak).

Friday Foto Fiesta

2008-09-05T15:34:00.001-07:00

I am a shameless copycat and really liked my dad's Friday Foto Fiesta, so I have adopted it as my own tradition as well. Today's picture is actually a painting that I have as wallpaper on my computer. It is probably my favorite painting of all time. I saw it in the Smithsonian when I was in high school and fell in love instantly. It is called Flaming June by Frederic Lord Leighton. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flaming_June is the link for more info on the picture. By the way, if anyone is interested in Christmas ideas for me, I would be absolutely ecstatic if I received a poster of this ;)

I am not sure just how many more moments of utter panic I can take...

2008-08-25T13:20:00.000-07:00

It's been a very busy weekend for us. Friday morning I woke up bright and early intending to take James to the park, maybe drive down to Eugene, la-di-da, have a good day. That was until Jay got the call. You see lately we have noticed little dried flakes of blood everywhere the cats have been. Those who have been through this before know where this is headed. I didn't know what they were, I thought maybe one of our cats had bloody sneezes or stepped on something. The cause of the nasty flakes was far more heinous. Jay had taken a sample of our problem to his job at the Willamette Humane Society for them to take a look at, and they called him back Friday just before he left for work. Fleas. Apparently little dried flakes of blood are actually flea poop. I. HATE. FLEAS. In the past two years I have calmly taken care of box elder beetles, strawberry root weevils, and many ant infestations. I have a favorite spider who lives behind our toilet. So mostly I am not bothered by insects. However if you happen to be a flea, bedbug or germ, take heed, I will find you and I will destroy you.
Friday morning plans were changed quite suddenly to total flea annihilation. I began making plans to burn down our house, until I learned that soapy water can be quite effective too. With the help of a giant cup of coffee with extra espresso added, I descended upon the flea population with a vengeance. I tore the house apart and single-handedly managed to wash, spray, and/or vacuum every inch of carpet, furniture and bedding in our duplex all before Jay came home from work. Caffeine keeps me very motivated. So does fear of fleas.
Later that evening Jay began to steam clean the carpets, while I washed, shampooed and combed our itchy kitties. Ewwwwww. We finally got to bed around 1 am in what I like to think is a flea free bedroom. But I am still quite itchy.
Sunday we decided we needed a break after our maniacal cleaning spree and the state fair was in town. I love state fairs and thought it was about time James learned where beef comes from. We had a lot of fun watching some clown shows, eating funnel cakes, and saying moo to all the animals. We also decided to let James try some kiddie rides. I went with him on the carousel, which went okay, but he did not want to sit still and so yelled at me the entire time. Then Jay went to take him on a little car that goes around a small track. Oooh how cute they are going to look, I thought riding around in a little car. Then I noticed Jay coming out of the gate, one child short. This was my reaction, and yes I really was speaking in all capital letters. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHY AREN'T YOU WITH JAMES??? HE MUST BE SO FREAKED OUT! ARE YOU COMPLETELY INSANE??!! HE CAN'T RIDE BY HIMSELF! OH THE HUMANITY!!"
Jay merely rolled his eyes, told me to cut the apron strings and that James was just fine. He then pried my fingernails loose from the gate and the ride commenced. To his credit, James was fine. While he wasn't exactly laughing and smiling, he wasn't crying, and seemed to be sort of enjoying himself. I think kids should be at least 18 before going on a carnival ride by themselves. At least that was my intention with James.

2008-07-28T17:47:00.000-07:00

In a few short weeks school will be starting up again for children and teachers everywhere. By the time that happens I hope to be employed with the school district in either a full time or substitute capacity. I have been thinking a lot about my career options lately and it seems that what I am best at and what I usually enjoy is teaching. So the next logical step to me would be to get hired on with the school district in some type of aide capacity while I seriously think about getting my teaching license.
This career change would be the third this year, and the fourth job I have had in a year. Not that my job right now is all that great, I am a customer service representative for TMobile. Yep, I am one of those voices on the other end whom you will end up loving or hating depending whether or not you get what you want. And no I don't take sadistic pleasure in telling people they really do owe 500$ on their telephone bill... well maybe sometimes.
The job at TMobile was really the last resort after getting laid off from the job I landed after graduating from college, the job that got us to Oregon in a somewhat podunk town with not a lot of career opportunities. So I told Jay last week that I had applied for a job with the school district. What he said was that I was somewhat flighty about my career. What I am sure he wanted to say was probably something like "Will you just try and keep a job already?"
I can agree that when it comes to careers and jobs (which are not necessarily the same thing) I do change my mind frequently. To be perfectly honest, I don't believe I have ever held a job for more than a year. I get bored, grass is greener, school schedules change, I move, whatever the reason, I go through jobs pretty fast.
Here is a sampling of some of the more interesting jobs I have held: grounds keeper (aka garbage truck driver) at Bryce Canyon National Park, caretaker for two elderly mentally handicapped gentlemen who liked to run around naked and set things on fire, cow milker (3 am, five days a week, about 200 hundred head of cattle), middle school substitute teacher, pizza deliverer, dishwasher, janitor, and preschool teacher more than once.
My goal now has been to find and keep an at least sort of enjoyable job long enough to establish some kind of tenure. I really do want to find a job that I enjoy enough to stay at longer than a year. It would be kind of fun to break my record. I think the chances are better if I could have summer vacation again.

2008-07-26T23:08:00.000-07:00

I just finished reading Solstice Wood, by Patricia McKillip, who btw is undoubtedly one of my favorite authors. I absolutely love how she mixes the everyday with fantasy and enchantment in a very poetic prose. There was a lot of food mentioned in this book, specifically chocolate cherry cookies, sooo after finishing the last few pages, I immediately thought of the wonderful Martha Stewart cookbook I received for my birthday which had a very similar recipe in it. About thirty dollars (haha Jay did you know how much I spent on ingredients???) , two hours, and one big freaking mess later (I am one messy cook) I had the most heavenly batch of double chocolate cherry cookies I had every seen. The tops were perfectly cracked, the inside was completely chocolately and gooey with just the right amount of sour cherry flavor. Wow. James helped of course, he cleaned off the beaters for me, and even squished his very own stick of butter between his hot little fingers for a good minute before I caught him.
I have gotten into the trend of making and freezing cookie dough lately so I can enjoy cookies at a moments notice (or maybe just get a quick dough fix). Since my parents are gracing me with a visit next week, I thought I would thaw out the dough and share. If any other family members would like to come down and visit us, the cookies are on me;)

Thank Heaven For Little Boys

2008-07-13T14:25:00.000-07:00

James and I had a very serious talk at the breakfast table this morning. At least it was as serious as a talk with a toddler can be. Lately I have been starting to let him eat snacks at the table with the big guys. He thinks he is the bee's knees when he gets to sit in a chair and eat food at the table. This morning however he began to sweep all of his cereal onto our newly vacuumed floor. So I very nicely told him that if he wanted to eat breakfast at the table with me instead of in his highchair he had to leave his food on the table, otherwise I would put him back in his highchair. Oddly enough he was actually listening to me during all of this and when I was finished he very slowly got down, picked up all the cereal on the floor and put it back on the table. YEA!!!!! I must have done something right.
James is now at the age where he likes to imitate EVERYTHING he sees us doing. It's kind of a telling moment to see how a little child perceives you. He very expressively plays the piano and sings like he sees Daddy do, and he opens my books and stares at them and then finds kleenex and blows his nose. Anyone who has lived with me knows how accurate that impression is.

Just to continue Jay's post of So Long TV...

2008-06-05T20:52:00.000-07:00

The cable on our TV is officially disconnected now. So long Scrubs, Reno 911, and VH1 top 100 videos, hello worthwhile activities and quality family time. Or so you think. But we still get the Discovery Channel, so now I can let my mind quietly stagnate to the tune of 'educational' television.
Today I learned how buses are made. This could be useful information to me since gas is like a trillion dollars a gallon and I will probably soon be riding a bus to work. Buses actually have wood paneling in the sides that are covered with fiber glass, and there are air compression tanks in the ceiling. I didn't know there was anything in the ceiling except more fiber glass. When I think of buses, the movie Speed comes to mind. So here is a snapshot of the thoughts in my head whilst watching this show
"air compression tanks in the ceiling eh? So now if I am riding a bus, and suddenly a mad bomber gets on a cell phone and says 'Hey I hid bombs in the air compression tanks, and no one knows where that is, hahaha you are all gonna die' I can say 'oh yes, they are in the ceiling' and save the day, hooray for me"
Useful information I tell ya. Thank God for the Discovery Channel, without it I might actually clean my kitchen.

2008-06-01T12:45:00.000-07:00

I recently read two blogs about the fun of getting up early in the morning and taking bike rides or runs, or just being alive first thing in the morning when all is quiet. It made me wonder what happened to me. I used to be an early riser. This was many many years ago when I was a child, but I would easily wake up at 6:30 even on weekends just to be outside and listen to the birds. Sometimes I would take walks early in the morning with my dad. Fast forward to four years of a combination early morning seminary and newspaper route, and I don't think I have voluntarily been out of bed before 8 am since. Sure I have had early morning jobs where I had to be at work by 5:30 am or some other unholy hour, and in those cases I got up and made it to work on time. But other than that nothing.
Mostly this is fine, because I discovered that just as your parents say nothing good ever happens after midnight, nothing good ever happens before 10 am. No stores are open, no one is awake to talk to, and I sure as hell am not getting up early just to clean the house. However lately I am finding out that mornings before work may be about the only real time I have to go running.
So for the past week or so I have been attempting to get out of bed at 6:30 to go for a quick jog. Here is what happens: I wake up, (sort of) I realize what time it is and think I could get out of bed and go running, OR I could lay here where it is warm and cozy and sleep for a little longer. At 6:30 am sleep always wins. I am not the most rational person when I am half-asleep (Jay and anyone who has shared a room with me can attest to this) and I just can't think why I should get out of bed. My body is very cranky first thing in the morning and even the thought of physical exertion makes it feel ill. But the truth is if I just got up, dressed and had a small bite to eat I would feel fine, but try convincing me of that when I am cozy under my covers.
I REALLY do want to get a schedule of running/biking in- I still want to run a 5k in September, and mostly I just want to lose some weight. Evenings just don't work on a regular basis. I have also heard that getting exercise first thing in the morning boosts your metabolism for the rest of the day.
So how does everyone else manage to get up first thing in the morning just to get exercise? I think I have a real mental block about getting up early, I have a feeling that if I could just do it for a couple of weeks I would see that I do enjoy it and would continue. Any suggestions from all you early birds out there would be appreciated.

What I am up to lately

2008-05-28T20:47:00.000-07:00

Apparently the pictures I was going to upload are still on the camera, and as the camera is who knows where, you will have to make do with my thoughts instead. I started my new job as a T-Mobile employee last week. I am in training for 4 weeks before they actually trust me to answer phones. I feel like I am in high school again, only this time I am a good 6 or 7 years older than everyone present. I am feeling rather bitter about the whole thing simply because this is the end result of thousands of dollars on a college education- in horticulture no less. Oh well, T-Mobile has some pretty killer benefits including incredibly cheap healthcare with vision and dental included, a daycare stipend and a kickass phone plan.
In case anybody is wondering, I haven't been running in at least a month, I made cream cheese walnut cookies last night that are 200 calories apiece (thank you Martha Stewart), and have been eating an ice cream bar a day. Damn, I am on a roll...

2008-05-28T20:44:00.000-07:00

Wow this photo thing is harder than I thought...

What A Slacker I Am

2008-05-28T20:41:00.000-07:00

I have gotten several nudges lately about not blogging. My argument is lack of inspiration and time (this is a pretty hard case to make though when one has been unemployed). But since I do feel like I have fallen of the blog-wagon (hahaha) here are some cute pics we took lately of James our future musician. I keep trying to take pictures of him as toga boy, but they are turning out blurry. In an effort to retain his modesty in front of his mommy, he now clutches his towel around his waist after bathtime and goes toddling through the house looking like a little Roman senator.

2008-04-14T18:57:00.000-07:00

I tried the great experiment of counting calories this weekend. I have tried this experiment in years past but usually quit after a couple of days. (Yes I do lack follow-through.) Taking a cue from my dad, this time I tried to use an excel spreadsheet. I was resolved to count calories, then do the calories from fat/protein/carbs ratio. I spent copious amounts of time yesterday figuring out exactly what I had eaten, more time looking up the calorie count and even more time trying to get all my functions on excel to work correctly. After all this work, I tried computing my info only to realize that I had not done my work correctly and my ratios were completely wrong. Needless to say I quit in disgust. I told Jay who was looking on with some amusement that this was the reason I could never be a numbers cruncher.
So calorie counting is just not going to work. I have too many other things to do like cooking healthy food and getting exercise and I can't afford to have somebody else do the meal-planning and calorie counting for me. Overall I think the biggest lesson I learned from all this was to stay away from the butter.

Cemeteries Make Great Arboretums

2008-03-30T21:27:00.000-07:00

Cemeteries make great arboretums. I learned that the other day at work. Apparently it is quite common to find new varieties of trees and shrubs growing at cemeteries, such as a variegated Ginkgo biloba to name one. The reason for these unique specimens? Embalming chemicals. All the embalming chemicals from ones used in days past, to the varnish used in coffins today eventually leach into the soil causing genetic mutations in plants, and incidentally higher cancer rates among nearby residents. Now just to make sure this claim was true I did a little research. Sure enough the University of Toledo in Toledo Ohio did a study on the topic and concluded that cemeteries have high levels of heavy metals such as lead, arsenic, and zinc due to embalming chemicals and coffin varnish in the soil and the groundwater.
So to all out there who may have a hand in my funeral when the time comes, let it be known: Iwould like to be cremated. I rather like the idea of going out in a blaze of glory anyway. As fun as it may be to know that my remains could be the basis of a new tree specimen, I would prefer to forgo the honor.

A Bunch of Random Things That Have Been On My Mind

2008-03-30T21:06:00.000-07:00

Here are a few thoughts that have been rambling through my mind this weekend while I have been at death's door with Montezuma's Revenge. I feel obligated to respond to Jay's comment about on me in his 'Crazy Cat Lady' blog. Yes, I did really say that "they aren't people, they're cats". Callous? Possibly. Yet I find it interesting how much we like to humanize our pets. Need an example? Look at any fancy feast commercial. While I do think it is sad that some animals have to be put down, I also think that's life, tough cookies for them. I find it amusing that some bleeding heart animal advocates talk about how cruel it is to do that to an cat/dog, and then go eat a Big Mac. I am more morally outraged by the treatment of livestock then by kitties who get three square meals, and then get to sleep the big sleep. Believe me, its a lot easier way to go. You want to hear an even more callous remark from me? I told Jay the cat who has been boarding with us for awhile needed to go and he asked "so which cat do you want to have put down so there is room for him?" My reply " I don't care, whichever one is at the bottom of the totem pole."
As I was lying around on the couch bemoaning my state on Saturday, Jay took to cleaning the entire house. This surprised me. He said he was going to clean the entire house, but I guess I figured he would quite once the downstairs was clean. I would have. I lack the attention span needed to do a full day's cleaning. Anyway, whilst cleaning up kitty stuff, he discovered ants in the utility closet where we keep the kitty food. Jay was properly horrified and kind of panicky cause the ants were crawling on him. I am over the whole "ants everywhere" scene since living in California. Occasionally we would wake up to find the counters in our kitchen absolutely black with ants. Then would proceed a day of spraying ammonia and cleaning up little dead ant bodies and chucking whatever food they got into. Once after such a day, I found a bag of raisins on the counter. Thinking nothing of it, and having the munchies I grabbed a handful and popped them in my mouth. It was after the fact that I saw ants all over my hand and the raisin bag. Apparently Mom had intended to throw the bag away but hadn't gotten around to it yet. I couldn't eat raisins for many years after that.
After an experience like that I hardly blinked an eye at the ants in our house. I merely brushed the ants off my feet and grabbed the ammonia.

2008-03-22T19:02:00.001-07:00

Easter, a Christian festival, embodies many pre-Christian traditions. The origin of its name is unknown. Scholars, however, accepting the derivation proposed by the 8th-century English scholar St. Bede, believe it probably comes from Eastre, the Anglo-Saxon name of a Teutonic goddess of spring and fertility, to whom was dedicated a month corresponding to April. Her festival was celebrated on the day of the vernal equinox; traditions associated with the festival survive in the Easter rabbit, a symbol of fertility, and in colored easter eggs, originally painted with bright colors to represent the sunlight of spring, and used in Easter-egg rolling contests or given as gifts.

Such festivals, and the stories and legends that explain their origin, were common in ancient religions. A Greek legend tells of the return of Persephone, daughter of Demeter, goddess of the earth, from the underworld to the light of day; her return symbolized to the ancient Greeks the resurrection of life in the spring after the desolation of winter. Many ancient peoples shared similar legends. The Phrygians believed that their omnipotent deity went to sleep at the time of the winter solstice, and they performed ceremonies with music and dancing at the spring equinox

2008-03-22T18:58:00.001-07:00

You Are Jelly Beans

For you, Easter is all about fun and sweet treats. None of that Jesus dying on a cross stuff!

What Easter Candy Are You?

I Make a Very Wet Souffle

2008-03-18T19:30:00.000-07:00

I made a souffle today for the first time ever. Actual it was probably also the first time I had ever eaten one as well. Every time I hear the word souffle Carol Burnett comes to mind and the song she sings on the musical Annie where she says "I make a very dry martini, I make a very wet souffle." I think I have my father to thank for my ability to remember song lyrics appropriate for any occasion. Anyway back to souffle making. I think it turned out well. It was like eating cheese flavored air. Since souffles are supposed to be light and fluffy I think that is a good sign. It was also an important lesson in patience. When one is cooking a souffle the most important thing to remember is NOT TO OPEN THE OVEN. Easy enough huh? Not for Miss Impatient. I open the oven for everything I cook at least half a dozen times. I caught myself in the act at least twice this time. Finally I went upstairs and just ignored it. Overall I liked it, James didn't, which was surprising and the verdict is still out for Jay. Of course since he didn't come home until an hour after it came out of the oven I am not sure his opinion counts.
I love experimenting with food, especially the stuff that no one really ever cooks. I taught myself how to bake bread in college. I had a friend of Hispanic heritage teach me how to make tamales. I have dabbled in Moroccan cuisine, Vietnamese, Thai, and Indian. Having recently reentered the carnivorous scene, I am pretty darned good at cooking tofu too. I think most people enjoy my cooking although there have been some doozies in the past. It occurred to me a week or two ago that I had never tried to make a souffle before. Obviously my curiosity had to be satisfied. I called up my cooking guru Nancy and asked for the lowdown on souffle making. (I think Nancy could make some good money giving cooking lessons).
I can confidently say I am a good cook. The only thing that has been giving me fits lately is my baking skills. I am not terribly good at baking. Most cakes and brownies for me come from a box. Some of you reading this may remember a certain Easter cake a few years ago. I blame that mistake on being pregnant at the time. I think the problem comes from being impatient. Cooking is a little more instant gratification. Baking takes longer, involves more pans usually, and makes me feel fat. But lately I have been craving the perfect cookie. The one that tastes good, and is soft and gooey on the inside. Mine have been less than sweet and terribly crunchy or just plain burned. I guess I will keep working on that.
I think my next cooking experiment will be chocolate molaise. For those who don't know, molaise is a type of Mexican sauce used for enchiladas and other dishes and sometimes it is made with cocoa. That is my kind of meal.

What's Wrong With This Picture

2008-03-14T16:56:00.000-07:00

Yesterday we took James to the Urgent Care Center for a sinus infection. It was a not a trip we were looking forward to, seeing as how we don't have any health insurance. Here is what happened: We went in, filled out a few forms and proceeded to then wait for 1 1/2 hours. During this time, James of course became very tired, bored, frustrated and began to scream. I told Jay maybe it was better if he screamed because they might get so sick of us maybe we would get a room sooner. Sensing that we had been cooling our heels long enough the staff showed us into a room where we waited for another hour. FINALLY a doctor showed up, looked at James for five minutes and spent most of that time telling us to put vaseline on the rash on his face. (DUH!) But we did get the prescription we needed. This whole process cost us about $100.
The point of this story is to illustrate the massive problems in our healthcare system. Our evening was very typical, especially for those who do not have healthcare. The real kicker is, James doesn't even have a regular doctor I could make an appointment with because I can't find a doctor who will take kids without health insurance. The health care system in this country makes me so mad I just want to kick and scream. Our family and millions of other families in America are in this situation. Fortunately for us we do not have to choose between going to the doctor and paying the heating bill or putting food on the table. Even so, we couldn't really afford it. Yet another bill on the credit card.
I just can't believe people pay that kind of money to talk to a doctor for FIVE MINUTES!! Especially since I knew what was wrong with him, and I knew exactly what would be prescribed. Jay seemed especially irritated by the doctor's diamond watch ;)
All the Republicans seem to think that the idea of free-enterprise medicine is what makes this country great and medicine so innovative. Republican politicians also by and large come from wealthy patrician families and have never gone a day in their lives without healthcare. I could not believe Bush vetoed the bill to extend Medicaid to more children, claiming it was a step toward socialized medicine. Boo to socialized medicine!!! (Incidentally I think the socialized medicine is a great idea) James could have health insurance right now if that bill had passed.
Ok, I realize this blog is a little rambling, but I am just venting my frustration on how out of touch with reality Republican politicians are and how totally f**cked up the healthcare system is. Pardon the language but aren't you glad I edited it?
(Pardon to the doctors out there reading this. No, I don't hate doctors specifically and I don't think they are grossly overpaid, (maybe just a little overpaid) I really blame the insurance and pharmaceutical companies and general corporate greed)

2008-03-11T20:24:00.000-07:00

Today is binky weaning day and that is a not a good day. James has run around with a bright red moustache for the better part of two months now and it is due to teething and excessive binky use. Thus far we have only given the obnoxious germy thing to him at bedtime, but with no improvement in his skin. So finally, today I took his binky, cut it up so it was 'broken' and let him play with it. Kind of heartbreaking to watch his tearful reaction whenever he looked at it, but such is life. So now Jay and I are in various parts of the house with head phones on so we cannot hear him crying. I am giving him two hours. Its already been 1 and 1/2 and he is still going strong. But as many family members can attest to, he's got nothing on me and my ability to scream as a child...

A Bit About Me To Get Started

2008-03-11T19:57:00.000-07:00

All the mad bloggers in my family have inspired me to put pen to paper, or fingers to keyboard... or whatever. I suppose it is a good way to keep in touch, and a way of venting my strange and sometimes radical thoughts.
I think the Beatles had it right when they sang "All You Need Is Love." A little more love and understanding in people's hearts could go a long long way to solving some of the world's biggest problems. But more on that later...
Just a few random tidbits about me to get us started. My ultimate dream in life is to someday go surfing. More than once would even be better. I have heard its similar to snowboarding which is wicked fun, but surfing would not be as cold nor would I hit the ground on my backside if I fell. (Its also a helluvalot cheaper;) Unfortunately my worst fear is deep water and drowning. So I think I have a long way to go towards accomplishing that goal, but I do plan on surfing before I die. I love trees, spiders, apple juice, and driving through really big puddles. I don't like Jay's cold feet in bed, vacuuming, and cooked button mushrooms- ewwwww. I have no patience with slow computers, bigotry in all its disguises, and bad drivers.
My goal for this year is to lose a good portion of this baby weight I have been dragging around since James came along. I have started running again and hope to complete a 5K race in September without coming in last. Now for those of you who can knock off a 5k without even breaking a sweat keep in mind I am REALLY out of shape.
I am fairly liberal in my political leanings, and a feminist to the core but I don't believe one should push one's beliefs on someone else.. I am sure I will talk more about that later as well.
So that's me in a nutshell. I hope my readers find this blog at least mildly entertaining and informative!

All You Need Is Love

Know your limits!!

Happy Birthday To Me!

A Tirade to Myself

Craigslist Classics

Wrong Number

Time to Come Clean

The Yin The Yang and the Me

"Balance Grasshopper....

Fun Times in the Kitchen, or how to make chicken go splat on your walls

A Mystery Most Puzzling

Day 1

Hey, I'm Back!

This is Unbelievable!

Why I Should Never Own a House

Am I the Only Guilty Party Here?

Day 3

I Love You George!!!

The Things That Define Us

On Being Sick and Feeling Sorry for Myself

Our Family Is Growing!

On the Dangers of Basil

My Summer Vacation, By Inger-Lis

The Eternal Gaze

I still got it!!

Alternate State of Mind

Is it the thought that counts??

Get Smart, Feed the World

The Mysteries of Language

Are You Ready for More Art??

Profound Profundity

Just Another Manic Monday

James and His New Friend

Three Words I Hate

Dance Party Saturday

The Ugly Duchess

If anybody wants me I will be in my cocoon

On following up with my resolutions

No Room For A Sneeze

Take Me The Way I Am

Who Does This Sound Like?

Don't You Wish You Were My Neighbor?

I envy turtles

If You Can't Laugh at Yourself, Who Can You Laugh At?

Landmark Today!

My Collection Is Nearly Complete!

It's Gardening Time!

My Saturday of Disrepute

A New Year

Bunny Food

Pocoyo!

My Midnight Moral Dilemma

Wow, Two Posts In Less Than 24 Hours... I Am Doing Good Today

It's Chocolate and Hives For Me

On A Happier Note...

Life just isn't fair

Top Ten Reasons Why I Love Oregon

What I've Been Up To

Am I Baby Hungry?

Two Women Running On A Beach, by Picasso

My whosit and a whatsit now??

I'm gettin' my knit on

What'd You Do This Weekend?

The Great Pumpkin

The Socialists Are Taking Over!! Run For Your Lives!

Crepes, anyone?

Hey Mom and Dad, I Betch Ya Never Heard This Story!

Friday Foto Fiesta

Dear Ms. Palin

Forget Mondays, Tuesdays are the crappiest

Friday Foto Fiesta

Friday Foto Fiesta

I am not sure just how many more moments of utter panic I can take...

Thank Heaven For Little Boys

Just to continue Jay's post of So Long TV...

What I am up to lately

What A Slacker I Am

Cemeteries Make Great Arboretums

A Bunch of Random Things That Have Been On My Mind

Pagan Origins